10 Ways of Dealing With Divorce:

1. Don't deny what's happening. Accept it, feel it, live it.

2. Cry, Scream, Let the emotion wash over you. Find a place that you can be alone where you feel it's safe to let go of all the emotion you feel. Let the emotions come. Let them pass through you. Feel Everything, Deny Nothing. Take as much time as you need, do it as often as neccessary. Bottling up the feelings you have will simply prolong the healing process. Do not be ashamed.

3. Know that no matter what, you will be okay. I know it sounds trite...but if you want to survive it, you will--it's that simple. The pain and grief will not last forever.

4. Create a loving atmosphere for any children and your Ex. Fighting in front of your children is simply unacceptable. If you are able to create a loving atmosphere for your Ex, you will not only show that you are willing to work on the healing, but it is safe to move on.

5. It's Only Stuff!! The couch, the TV, the Washer and Dryer can all be replaced! Don't let yourself be walked on, be fair. But don't fight over stupid things. Choose your battles carefully for the things that really matter.

6. Keep yourself busy! Find new things to do. Take some cooking classes, get social! Keep in touch with your friends, go out and connect.

7. Get comfortable with being alone. Do not rush yourself. It could take 1 month, or 1 year. The more you become self-sufficient, the better off you will be in future relationships...to a point! You will know when you are ready.

8. Don't blame yourself for everything! Marriage was a union of two. Divorce is a separation of TWO. Both of you made mistakes. Accept your portion of the mistakes, acknowledge them, learn from them, LET THEM GO!! Just vow not to repeat history!

9. Release the power your Ex has over you. Do not let your Ex push your buttons. No one can piss you off like your Ex!!! They WILL do it. Once they find a button, you must disconnect it--permanently! It takes time, it takes patience, it takes self-discipline. But once you release the power your Ex has over you, you will gain more self-respect and freedom.

10. You are worthy of a new love! Don't be afraid. You will know when you are ready, so don't rush yourself. Believe in yourself and be self-confident. Go.

I've gone through this, survived and found new love. You will too.

If you want to see what other people are going through, look at The Worst Things About Divorce.

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