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Here's something I've been struggling with a bit lately.

Intellectually I see the idea of being androgynous as having more than a few advantages. I should point out that I'm using the term in a complete way, no hormones or neuro-chemistry to point towards a gender.

Most of these have been discussed in other nodes. The idea of being 'free' from biology, not having social expectations (gender roles in all their forms), biological drives (reproduction, relatonships, sex) or physcology (testosterone/estrogen fooling around with your emotions and feelings).

Escaping Ziggies neuroses, and dodging the Jungian archetypial boxes sounds like a wild ride, certainly an adventure. So why can't I see myself doing it??

As a few people have mentioned, androgyny on the net is easy, in fact preferable for some. Certainly I cringe anytime someone asks me, 'A/S/L?'. Mostly because it says, 'Come hither, I have a bunch of boxes, which one do you fit into??'. Why do you care what my plumbings like? I certainly don't think with it (or type for that matter). In cyberspace it is less important than ever. You can't touch me, I won't let you see me. So its academic isn't it?

Yet the paradox remains. I like to know! I've asked poeple for their A/S/L. Ahhh gotta love double think.

I find no matter how I intellectualize it, I can't imagine myself as an Androgyne. I know that without the neuro-chemicals driving me, I'm unlikely to miss sex. In fact I'll most likely revel in being free from it. I imagine I'd get used to not having gendered plumbing anymore. I imagine I'd be defining new relationships in a 'Brave New World' so would I be lonely?

But I just can't do it. It's too ingrained in me. I just can't see my self going to a doctor and saying, 'I'm ready, Doc. Ready for the operation. Lets do it.'

So if I can't be the explorer, who will? Is it fair to say, 'Not until someone paves the way first.'?

Probably not. A part of me feels really bad about that. I'm not sure if I'm feeling bad about that through some combination of reproductive urges and social conditioning, or if it just a bad idea.

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