Anti-Porn

Anti-Porn is a facist. His real name is David McNamara. He goes by the name Anti-Porn on DALNET's IRC servers. I am not making this up. He actually called himself a facist. He is Christian and wants to help rule the world and make it illegal to do any of the following.

1. Illegal to have sex with anyone that you are not married to.
2. Illegal to have sex that causes a woman to orgasm
3. Illegal to have sex for any reason but procreation.
4. Illegal to have oral or anal sex.
5. Illegal to own, view, or participate in pornography.
6. Illegal to have intimate relations with someone of the same sex.
7. He had many more on his website, but I lost it, and since then he has changed it because he got lots of flamemail and hate mail.

Actually, anti-porn is a stunning creation of the CERN Laboratories.

Fabricated in the same accelerated chambers that create anti-particles, these scientists, with plenty of time on their hands, have combined beams of chaste neutrons, asexual protons and a picture of Janet Reno to create anti-porn. The substance, purple in color, is of a grainy, toothpaste like texture. When smeared on any pornographic item it causes it to loose all of whatever minimal drawing power it might have had.

Parents are buying tubes of it by the crate load, and the christian coalition is already laying plans for the anti-porn bombing of Las Vegas.

Since he's exactly the kind of dork who would try to sue me for cutpasting his entire webpage on here, I'll paraphrase and you can laugh at Mr. Anti-Porn Guy's idiocy.

There's a mirror of his original site here:
http://www.spies.com/~gus/ran/0012/antiporn/

Not only does David McNamara want to prohibit anal and oral sex, but has even gone so far as to propose prison terms for such "crimes": 1-5 years for oral and 1-10 year for anal. He also wants to ban the manufacture of contraceptive devices with a $5000 fine and up to 1 year in jail.

IT GETS WORSE!

He also wants all interracial marriages to be immediately annulled and wants the children to be restricted to marrying other interracial children (I have yet to understand the logic behind that one). Naturally, he wants affirmative action to be annulled because it's "racist against white people". Oh, and he says he's not a racist, by the way.

He also believes that transvestites and drug dealers deserve the death penalty, and that homosexuals and people with fetishes should be put in mental hospitals.

IT GETS WORSE!

He believes in a National Dress Code
Red China, anyone?

Women must wear dresses.
Men must wear clothes from the neck to three inches below knees. (Oh, so it's not OK to be gay, but it's OK to wear Capri pants?)
No jeans.
No "offensive or profane" things on the clothes.

IT GETS WORSE!

He supports Project Carnivore. Further, he wants the government to be able to search anybody's house at any time for pornography, drugs, or evidence of sexual deviance!

And worst of all... and possibly the funniest...

He wants to run for office.