Yesterday I hiked up Stawamus Chief with p_i and 8 or so other modem folk, so today when I woke up I was mighty sore. I got to limp around because one leg is more sore than the other, and people would do a double take at me on the bus because they didn't expect a young'n like me to be limping. This so amused me that I was almost tempted to keep limping even after the ache went away, but thankfully I've mastered some degree of restraint in my life. I woke up and threw a rubber snake at my cat. I think I've discovered why he likes to chew on my computer's cords and cables - they look like rubber snakes. Toby is entranced and spends the rest of the day biting, chewing, carrying, throwing and chasing this snake. The snake, unperturbed, continues to bare its rubber fangs menacingly. Ahh, such unrefined courage!

I went to church. I was a bit late and had to sneak in between sections. We had a guest minister (well, they're all guest ministers; the church doesn't have a regular minister or even an interrim minister right now. they're looking, I hear. maybe I'll give them dem bones' name and we can have a sermon on the ethics of noding.), Bill something, who gave a rollicking sermon that went from anti-christian to pro-atheism to elaborate descriptions of aspects of hinduism and ending by recommending we strive to remember our true selves. He managed to find some obscure jewish psalm that seemed to hint vaguely at God being an aspect of the self, hidden in Judaism's simple dualism. Wacky guy. Apparently he was a research chemist before went in for the ministry; you could tell he was some flavour of science geek when he started quoting Schrödinger in his sermon. And the choir sang some song about Nova Scotia. Afterwards I was talking with some of the choir and someone asked why they'd sung that song during service. "Because it's an important song." "Why?" "Because, it's beautiful." I like these unitarians.

I went downtown to work; we moved our office on friday and I wanted to doublecheck that all my computers were still alive and kicking. The lanmodem was turned off, but all the critical boxes seemed happy. I changed the dates on all of my date stamps since I though I might forget in my monday morning stupor; I looked down at one of them and noticed that MAY spelled backwards as it is on a rubber stamp says YAM. Yes folks, it's national Yam awareness month! Send tributes to the queen of yamland to me!

I went to get cat food and kitty litter. My cat's food was on sale so I also bought some gushy mushy canned cat food for him. I wanted to get the scratching post shaped like a traffic cone, but I figure I'll wait until he's finished demolishing my cardboard boxes; maybe that'll convince me to unpack them. I came home, and Toby was still chasing around his snake. oh, Toby, I love you.

My brains surprised me again by cooking up some quite interesting dreams last night. You can find those in the good old Dream Log.

It's the eve of wappu today. I'm still trying to figure out if there is anything special to do. As far as most finns are considered, the only option is to guzzle hard liquor until you puke and pass out. No thanks, I'll pass.
Boozing was fun for a while, but nowadays I don't feel that being numb, having impaired motor skills and acting like a severely retarded person is that funny/entertaining. Blame it on the herbal remedies, won't you. :)
Please, don't tell about me not being into alcohol to anyone inside the Finnish borders. They would most likely deport me to Sweden. (No finn could survive that!)

I'd better start asking my friends if anyone has anything fun planned. If not, it's an another night for noding ahead.


I had no luck in organizing anything for tonight. All of my friends were either "not feeling like partying" or in some remote place, not far from the middle of nowhere.

So, here I am. Hopefully with enough quality ideas to submit my 100th writeup before I get too tired to node. At the moment I'm 6 writeups short. No wait, it's actually 8. I forgot the nuke request and the requested nukeable one.

I guess I should get to work then.

i made a nodeshell. spank me, i am naughty!

the nodeshell is rocks my socks, which is a cutesy slang phrase for something that's really cool. i started to ramble incoherently when i was typing it, because i didn't have anything else to say and i'm bored and tired but not sleepy. you know how that goes. so i put some of that rambling here and rambled and rambled and rambled some more. i rambled and rambled till my rambler was sore.

yay that rhymed! everyone knows rhyming is the key to many things in life - why do you think all that stuff they taught you in elementary school rhymed?

"in fourteen-hundred-ninety-two, Columbus sailed the ocean blue..."
"if it's yellow, let it mellow..."

not just rhyming though. rhyming and alliteration. 'cuz alliteration is cool too. and monkeys. monkeys rock my socks. they make rad monkey noises and fling poop at people. sometimes i wanna go "Eee! Eee!" and fling my poop at things too. like that fucking taco bell dog, and the old lady in those old navy commercials. and those damn Gap ads. those make me want to die. Did *you* know that The Gap and Old Navy are the same company? they ARE! maybe i should get some monkeys and set them loose in an old navy to wreak havoc by flinging poop. that would show The Gap that people won't just stand idly by while they assimilate the human race with kooky kitschy krappy (see! alliteration!) ads. heck no. the wrath of poop-flinging monkeys would put a stop to THAT noise, believe you me. or maybe i should just go to Old Navy and take a poop in the dressing room. i could pretend i thought it was a bathroom stall. i'd come running out with my brand new old navy cargo pants around my ankles, screaming at the poor minimum wage-earning GapBots.

"hey YOU! where's the farking TOILET PAPER? i just took a BIG STEAMING DUMP in that stall over there, and there's NO TOILET PAPER! and how the HELL do you flush those things?! HUH? ANSWER ME!@#@!"

hehehahahahheee. pooping is funny. if i was asian, i'd tell people my name was Pu Ping. or Hu Flung Pu. is that racist? there's funny english names too, like dick trickle and hugh jass and mike hunt. but chinese names are funny sometimes. i wonder if there's American names that are screamingly funny in other languages. Randy i suppose, but that's not REALLY another language. Like if it turned out that my name meant "festering nipple" in Urdu. that would rock my socks.

"flung" is a wicked funny word. i dunno why, i just really like the sound of it. flung flung flung. FLUNG. it sounds like it should be some sort of onomatopoeia, but it isn't, unless you fling a bell or something. FLUNG. hehehahahaa.

mung bung dung FLUNG. bonnnnggg.

every time we walk past the abercrombie and fitch in harvard square, my friend yells "I AIN'T DOWN WITH THAT MACARONI AND FISH SHIT!", especially if a door is open. i think the employees might be afraid of us. they better be. or they will feel the wrath of my legions of POOP-FLINGING MONKEYS.


i have no idea what i was doing when i wrote this, but i think senseless rambling is funny sometimes. if you don't like it, TOUGH BEANS PAL. i suppose you could vote me into oblivion but these are my honest, heartfelt opinions! i'm POURING MY HEART OUT HERE, RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW, FOR YOU, ON EVERYTHING TWO (rhyme! yay!)

man, am i tired.


  • The smiling guitar man, whose head is always cocked to one side when he sings, who used to hit on my sister when she worked downtown, is wearing an ivory corduroy suit jacket and a tie that's too small. As i walk by, he says to the man he's talking to (in his rough rough voice) No - no cigarettes. Koresh told me not to.
  • A middle-aged man with dirty hair and dirty clothes (dirty all over) has lifted his sweatshirt and is mindlessly toying with the flesh flap of his stomach as he stares into an empty storefront window. That's all.
  • A little girl eating pizza flashes me a peace sign. I look back and hold up three fingers. She grins.
  • The cat that approaches me from across the street is not a kitten as i originally thought, but stiff and thin. His head is too big for his body.
  • I sent a postcard to CowboyNeal. The guy in the picture was something else. Ask him about it.
  • "I didn't realize you had such big fantastic tits!" Someone has actually said this to me. Honest. I didn't know what to say.
  • There's a beautiful old house gone to rack and ruin in a full neighborhood. In the middle of a patch of dirt by the front door, there's a faded wooden sign that reads, All-American Garden.
  • I'm thinking about the guy that gave me this skirt. He said he wore it in high school. It's almost a rag now but i wear it anyway. I wonder where he is: on his way to Florida, on his way to California, shacked up with a sweet little hippie girl, picking echinacea, fixing cars? No way to know.
  • This is written on a receipt in a cemetery. Potatos, vidalias, tofu, mango, goya chick peas, Jofeph Adolfovs, 1786, in ye 31st yr of his age, node node node node. The cashier's name is Willa, the same as my best friend. i almost fall asleep in the grass.
  • When i got home, Dan was watching Fire, walk with me again. again.

This is not a dream. This is my life.
Got distance? Yesterday, my roommate filmed her film class project at the park. I find the storyboards, light meters, the big clunky Bell & Howell WWII surplus 16mm camera, and the actors and actresses, all just fascinating. So, I help out from 2PM-7PM calling out distance settings for the camera, taxi-ing actresses to sanitary facilities, lugging stuff around the park, and wrangling Xena the schnauser/poodle ("schnoodle") as necessary. Today I am sunburned, but damn, it was fun!
I did NOT blow the surprise of the wedding shower surprise party. It was close - the formal invitation should have said something about the surprise nature of the event, and the hostess could have made mention when I RSVP'd yesterday.
It's all part of The Plan. In the highly structured and increasingly planned/managed safety net that my life is becoming, today is Plan-Next-Month Day. May 31 retrospective: The Great Ideas were not very helpful in placing "spirituality" in The Grand Scheme of Things. I pursued Car Stuff, perhaps not as aggressively as I could have, but enough. It never seemed like The Right Time to retake the ruined pics of the train station. Didn't touch the Aptiva or Linux. Occasions duly honored. 401k stuff done. (Like preparing income tax declarations, it was much quicker and easier than I had dreaded; probably spent more energy agonizing and avoiding it than actually completing it.) Campaign: not happening unless I personally coordinate sessions, and I haven't felt like it. Yet. What made me think I would simply paint a room of my own free will? No wonder I slacked off on this stuff, I completely blew off ALL the Rewards.
Still fucking sick.

I fucking HATE being sick like this. Sinuses.


Wife took me out to brunch this morning, tho. Place in San Francisco called All You Knead (lovcated at Haight & Masonic, roughly). Despite the fact that they have a retarded name, the food is excellent.

Don't go there, tho. I don't wanna get stuck waiting for you to leave so I can have a seat.

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