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The scene opens with Greg sitting in front of the camera. His face is flushed, and he is giggling as he focuses the camera.

"Hehe, okeedokee, folks. X'melborp's busy, so I'm running the show today, and I am on like fifteen different kinda alien pain killers. Let's rock." He spins around in the swivel chair. "First one is. . . "

Onscreen, a line of text appears:

What is the purpose of birds?

"Shit dude, I dunno. Next."

Another question appears.

Greg, why are you always grouchy?

"I just told you I've got enough alien drugs in me to start a pharmacy. I'm ecstatic. Next."

How many bones have you broken, and have they all healed?

"Broke my left arm once, right leg twice. Yes, they're healed. Humans are squishy, but if we don't die, we usually heal. Next."

Human Greg, what is that marking on your leg? I saw it in a Greg Sleeps video. Is it another injury?

Greg turns and shouts, "X'melborp! I told you, no videos of me sleeping!"

"But the people love them!"

"Ugh! So that's a tattoo-- when humans mark their skin permanently with ink. I did it because the human I was into liked tattoos."

Did the human you favored reciprocate your feelings?

"No. Next question. I got one more in me before I pass out."

Human Greg, what happened to Quark?

"The spider? The spider is fine. He's in a tank in X'melborp's room. Anyways I--" He stops suddenly. "I. . ." his eyelids droop. "I think the rest of the meds are. . ."

His head falls heavily onto the desk. After a moment, snoring can be heard.

The video continues on for another fifteen minutes before X'melborp comes in and turns the camera off.


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