One of the catchphrases popularized on Spinnwebe's Dysfunctional Family Circus and It's a Dysfunctional Life. Perhaps best imagined as delivered by a megalomanic emperor or supervillain pointing his bejeweled fingers at the image of a nubile young nymph.

Sometimes it pays to have minions.

One can imagine the likes of Bill Gates in his golden years, ensconced within the booby-trapped walls of his ultra-secret compound, leering toothlessly at the pickled and surgically-preserved cantaloupes of Britney Spears on VH-1's "Who The Hell Cares Where They Are Now" special edition. Turning to his chief vizier, the Microshaft Guru takes a long drag from his inhaler and wheezes, "Bathe her and bring her to meeeeee."

It's almost enough to make me feel sympathy for the bimbo.

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