The fine art of beating someone severely, a HOWTO.
  1. Decide on someone to beat severely.
  2. Come up with a reason. This can be well thought out, or a simple whim. (The fact that the person exists is a perfectly good reason)
  3. Approach said person, and inquire, "Can i beat you severely?" If the answer is no, then reply, in a non-threatening, very serious tone, "I am going to beat you severely".
  4. Locate an item to beat them severely with. Feathers, pencils, string, the sleave of a jacket, they all work.
  5. Proceed to beat them severely. Remember, do not, under any circumstances, hit harder then a gentle tap. Nothing that could ever be construed as hurting someone.
  6. State firmly and clearly, "I am beating you severely, you may begin screaming in pain any time now".
  7. If they don't, look at them again, and say "I wish it hadn't come to this.", and procede to tickle them mercilessly. (NOTE: Only if they are ticklish)

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