Being stoic, Daoist, and at one with the universe is NO FUN

Or maybe Lao-Tzu and Chuang Tzu forgot something about the Dao.

Perhaps the Buddha forgot to make an exception in terms of moderation.

Maybe all religions are missing something vital to life.

It's all a possibility.

At any rate, I'm trying to be stoic, Daoist, moderate, and all those other good qualities. Once in a great while, I'll succeed, and I'll be content, at ease, and one with the universe.

But most of the time, I'm disappointed. Maybe I'm letting the innate suffering of the universe get to me. Maybe I don't understand the teachings of various people. Most likely, I'm not comprehending some very important part of the various religions and philosophies. Even more likely, I'm scared to change, scared to fully dive into these new ideas and philosophies, scared that I or my viewpoint on life might actually change.

But at any rate, I'm not having any fun.

I try not to be overwhelmed with emotion. I accept anger, sadness, happiness, et al, but I try not to let any of them control me. I'm trying to see past my materialist up bringing.

When I do make an effort to have some fun, I feel as though I'm working against the Dao. Perhaps this is because I view fun as emotions outside the normal range of life. Perhaps I simply need to change how I view fun.

Or, maybe I need to re-study the various writings from which I gain inspiration. Maybe I should stop being so serious, stop being quite so concerned about what goes on in the world, and just concentrate on the natural flow of the universe.

Perhaps I need to quit with the bullshit.

Maybe it's time to cut the philosophies, and just try to live my life without any religions or philosophies to guide me; I should live my life at the moment, not from the past or future.

Maybe I simply need to start over; I should re-evaluate my positions on life, on the various philosophies I accept.

Perhaps I shouldn't accept them so blindly.

How does one live life?

What is life, for that matter?

What should influence you, and to what degree?

Why?

Am I really as full of bullshit as I think I am, or am I in even deeper than that?

All I know is, I'm going to start having fun again.

I can relate with your sentiments. I like Stoicism. I think logic and reason are the only firm basis for understanding the world. I like Daoism. It's one of the few belief systems that manages to empower the individual and not the institution.

But I don't think that either one of these will give you meaning or purpose in life. When you find emptiness, what then? You are free, what will you do with your freedom?

To quote Nietzsche's "Thus Spake Zarathustra":

And lost be the day to us in which a measure hath not been danced.
And false be every truth which hath not had laughter along with it!

It's up to you how you live your life. The things that give you pleasure are yours to enjoy, and the things that give you pain are yours to bear, or to reject. The whole world is telling you not to trust yourself, because they want to control you. Trust yourself. Be happy and thankful for the gift of existence. Be open to the unknown. Start having fun again.