A tract by Jack T. Chick, published in 2000.

Theme this time? "Witchcraft is eeeeevil. And don't do Drugs, Man." All inspired by a popular TV show.

The tract opens warmly. Literally.

Satan is having a meeting in Hell, but before the people of the Netherworld have their meeting, the big S wants to see his favorite TV show.

(You read that right. Apparently the Lord of Darkness is getting lazier over time and has the long-term goal on becoming a couch potato. I wonder if Satan also likes zappily flavored crisps? In that case, in longer run, we probably don't need Armageddon because Satan will get so much overweight that he won't be able to move. So, isn't Satan watching TV a good thing? Handsome potato for an impressively carved couch, too. But I digress... Sorry, I won't do this again.)

Satan thinks the show paved the way for all occult and vampire programs that are really popular these days. Yep. Sort of like Killer Rock...

Satan's ghastly lieutenants report that sales of ouija boards has risen, and drugs are selling really nicely. Astrology book sales soar, one lady even was reported to say that astrology should be taught in schools.

On the background, graphs show steady, exponential growth of Anarchy, Pornography and Homosexuality. One ghost-faced lieutenant tells that One World Government is coming, with Satan's people in lead.

(But hey, if the first-mentioned graphs work as they seem, perharps the pr0n-spreading gay anarchists will ruin the Satan's world government plan. Oops, sorry, I promised not to digress.)

Further, while Bible-believing churches exist, the Satanic ecumenical movement will deal with that. (I was wishing to see open hostility from JTC against ecumenical movement - so far, I didn't see it, but this was a direct hit, I'm sunk.)

Satan seems to have a single problem, a girl called Ashley who's into drugs. Her grandmother is praying for her.

Ashley has taken LSD and Speed. She attends a medium's session who summons her mother's spirit there...

She goes to see her grandmother, who talks about Nasty Things like familiar spirits and how they're evil according to the Bible (Lev. 20:27)

That Satan's hitman gives Ashley then a nasty flashback, and she sees her face melting when she looks at mirror. Heart attack.

Grandmother keeps praying, and Ashley wakes up, grandmother tells her that Jesus is the only way and Ashley accepts him as the savior and she dies but goes to heaven blah blah blah...

All in all, pretty amusing tract, especially the beginning shows that Chick is one of those people who put "mental" in "fundamentalism". =)

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.