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Consciousness is a form of psychosis. In our bestial form we were of want for nothing but perseverance. This is the whole of our purpose. To linger for so long as we are able. As our minds overdeveloped we became disconnected with our natural place in the world and perceived ourselves as separate from the world. We ever more reject ourselves as part of a system. Even as we compartmentalize our scientific understanding of where we come from we become further alienated by the concept of where it all will lead us. Ignoring finality in our ambition to pursue a meaningful future by which we may collectively cheat our useless existence followed by complete death. Cognition is the flawed tool by which; we see ourselves, in many different forms; we see the universe, with many different purposes; and we see the future, with many different outcomes. In the end the only use of the human mind is self-indulgence. Even as one can argue our mind has put us at the top of the food chain now, our dominating and patriarchal clutch on earth will end. Nature will restore itself, and ecological order will put us back in our place. So what more is cognition than a form of psychosis that took over our evolutionary ancestors? A psychosis that unnecessarily convoluted the liminal skills required for us to survive on earth.

 

Are we not better off as simple beings, innocent of subjectivity? For instance our knowledge of death does nothing to prevent it insofar as animal instinct can protect one from danger. Are we not better off constrained by a smaller more direct framework of reality rather than unlimited foresight. Concerning survival, our evolutionary response to it is naturally occurring. We became more intelligent to overcome more and more obstacles. But the extent of our self-awareness goes well beyond what's necessary. And so we are disillusioned by a false percept of reality that places each one of us at the center of our own universe. Is this not a fault in our cognitive abilities? The inability to control it's range to that which is required for us to simply survive.

 

Would I give up consciousness if I could? Certainly not, and I wouldn't suggest lobotomizing the entire populace, although ideologically this has been attempted.  But would I like to live as an animal?  Yes, I would.  We live in a very frigid abject reality. We reshape this reality with ephemeral luxuries created to distract us from the cold truth that we are mere emanations of ancient energy directing us aimlessly through chaos. But you say to yourself " I AM IN CONTROL", "it is by volition that I create my world". In what form heretofore has your will truly directed you through life? In the natural world, by reaction to the influence of the physical world, organic life seeks that which allows perseverance. In the conscious world, emotional reality perverts simple physical survival. We build elaborate works of fiction in the form of buildings, sculptures, paintings, literature, and music to express the whole range of emotions we go through.  The most fearful of us endeavor to capture a moment in time and freeze it for all eternity, wish for an immortal name, and an idol to hold that name.  As though they are unique among us, or we are unique among other creatures, but we are all equals.  Time and matter and being will melt away and disappear into the abysm.

 

There is no pinnacle of truth. We, each and every one of us, define our lives as we see fit. And there is no right or wrong ultimatum except death. We importunately fill in the gaps of the "why" and "what is" in our journey through life for selfish justification of our irrational actions, which I see as a result of this very need within us to define the world. More elaborately, by sequential (I choose not to use the word 'logical') delineation we reduce the world to cold individual pieces of a complex puzzle then try to re-assimilate these pieces into mechanized but meaningful cohesion. Doing all this is just mental masturbation, self-indulgence is therefore our biggest trait. Don't get me wrong, I like to have fun too, but this self-indulgence is necessary and also.... insanity. As the saying goes, idleness is the mother of all vices, so it is that humanity may never sit still. Our unceasing curiosity will always look for the next problem to contemplate, then, unfortunately resolve. This insatiable need to to understand and constantly stroke our ego manifests itself into a search for meaning where no (more) meaning may be found. This is by nature of our subjective view on life, and while we may be able to look into and define objectivity, this skill of reason provides no supreme causal destination. The psychosis of consciousness, therefore, is defined in that we try to superimpose an intricate labyrinth of reason on the simple fact that this world is. What more does art do than meticulously reform the world by way of sensuous articulation of what is already expressed. Exchanging a useless natural percept for a useless abstract one. And no more is there a need to complicate this world than is there a need to simply survive. But even survival is just a penultimate truth of life, and it is no more necessary outside of instinct than is our subjective need to counterfeit this world into an aesthetic we find agreeable to our sensibilities.

 

Everyday you walk through the city streets and everyday you look around and see that something is wrong.  I'll tell you what you see.  All this shit isn't supposed to be here, its not a part of the natural world it is borne of mankind's irrational world.  Borne of an incurable sickness in mind of mankind. Borne to accommodate a select few, borne on rotting flesh and bones of the many who do not fathom it, are separate from it. Virtues and vices are subsequently borne of this false world, to protect its fragile foundation.  And until all that you see crumbles and recedes into the ocean of the natural, these false idols of the demiurge mankind will always haunt you.

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