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Crucial Unit is an iced-tea-fueled thrash band from Pittsburg, PA. As a hardcore thrash band, you might guess that they sound somewhat similar to Gang Green and Charles Bronson, and you'd be right; however, peppered within the supersonic speed-punk is a delicious bouquet of lixx that are so metal, it brings a tear to Tommy Lee's eye.

What really sets The Unit apart from other hardcore bands, however, is their sense of humor -- something that is severely lacking in the hardcore scene. With lyrics like "We like protons because they're positive," even the most hardened Throwdown fan can't help but chuckle. However, this is not to say that Crucial Unit is a joke band or the thrash equivalent of Weird Al, for intermixed with the fun and games are some of the wittiest and most acrimonious criticisms of our political system, the state of the "punk" scene, and Western society at large -- again, something that has unfortunately been lacking in hardcore music lately.

For snotty, fun, and poignant hardcore, especially for us closet metalheads, it really doesn't get much better than The Unit.

Crucial Unit is (as far as I can tell):

  • "Metal" Mike Bolam - bass
  • Justin Cummings - vocals
  • Scott "Ian MacKaye" Ryan - guitar
  • Hoss - Guitar
  • Gino "Louie Twice" Maione - drums
  • Chris "vegan christian tech metal" Strunk - presumably a tech
  • JD Foster - former drumer, may or may not still drive the tour van

Here is their discography. Lyrics and mp3's for every song are available on their website (see references section below).

Premium Iced Tea 7" (Crucial Blast Records)

  1. Crucial Unit Theme Song aka Thrashin' Is Our Business and Business Is Mediocre At Best
  2. Living Room Mosh Pit
  3. Baby, I Don't Want to Make Out, I Just Want to Circle Pit
  4. Fuck Electrons
  5. Communitea
  6. Off The Gods
  7. Boy I'm Going to Set You on Fire If You Say Another Fucking Word
  8. Give The World A Hug
  9. Let's Unite The Punx and Skinz, Put 'Em on A Boat, Send Them Off to Sea, and Sink Those Fuckers

Seven Split Inches of Destruction - Split 7" with Killed In Action (FastForLife Records)

  1. Fingerpoint and Click
  2. DRI Not EMF
  3. Security Sludge
  4. Smell The Bacon, What's With You
  5. In This Defiance of The One Urinal Rule

Moshzilla 7" (De La Mente)

  1. Teabag God
  2. Rice Traitor
  3. Usable Buildings
  4. Change Time
  5. Blatantly Obvious Political Song
  6. Columbus Fest Is A Celebration of Genocide
  7. Wingout at Kinkos
  8. End Result of Drinking Too Much Iced Tea
  9. Bonus Track

Go Down Fighting, Come Up Smiling Compilation CD (Hope Records, Hard Travelin')

  1. Communitea II
  2. PDA

Thrashaholics Unanimous - Split LP with Municipal Waste (Six Weeks Records #57)

  1. Five Inches of Oppression
  2. I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream For No Screamo
  3. 900 Samosas
  4. Wall of Death The Chain of Life
  5. I Heard Mayday Was A Riot
  6. Scrabble Punx
  7. Million Dollar Thrash Song
  8. This Machine Kills Buffets
  9. Thrashaholics Unanimous

Everything Went Strunk - Semi-Discography CD (De La Mente Records)

(Premium Iced Tea 7", Moshzilla 7", Killed In Action Split, 11 compilation tracks, and a live set)

Death to Hardcore, Death to Reagan Compliation LP (xMike Fitzgeraldx Records)

  1. Nailgun to Your Lips
  2. Youth Crews Aren't Like Menudo
  3. Anti-Bracist Action

Sea of Steal Vol 1. - Split with Rambo (Ed Walters Records)

  1. Mosh Against Milk Solids
  2. Chinese Restaurant Mosh Pit
  3. Bikes Not Bush
  4. Squat The Woods

Super Sabado Compilation LP (Six Weeks Records, Prank Records, and 625 Thrashcore)

  1. Adolthood

These Colors Get The Runs LP (Six Weeks Records #76)

  1. Dubyanomics
  2. Adolthood
  3. Bruce Springsteen Needs The Workers, But The Workers Don't Need Bruce Springsteen
  4. No Loafin'
  5. Crucial Unit's Friendship Picnic
  6. Keep Punk Moderately Dangerous
  7. Crucial United Forces
  8. Cleanliness Is Next to Godliness, Too Bad We're All Atheists
  9. Communitea III
  10. These Colors Get The Runs
  11. The Quest for Certaintea

Update Oct 19, 2004: Crucial Unit will play their last show ever on Oct 23, 2004, 7:00 PM at The Mr. Roboto Project. They'll be playing with Caustic Christ, Municipal Waste, and Refuseniks.


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