"You have received a virtual gift for your 18 anniversary on LiveJournal" is the subject line in today's email.

It's the first email I've received from LiveJournal in 9 years.

December 15, 2003 was when I created an account there. As I recall, that was a season where Everything2's disappearances were frequent, and via AOL Instant Messenger (or was it IRC? I never had an AOL account) I learned that many members of the E2 community were posting writing on LiveJournal to keep the juices flowing.

I haven't been active on LiveJournal since 2008 (except for a single post in 2010 as part of a marketing promotion for a show I was performing). But I peeked in today to remember the goofy freedom I felt writing there-- I always felt E2 deserved idiosyncratic nonfiction and pure creative writing, while LiveJournal was for personal updates (before we had Facebook and Twitter)

Some days
It all feels
So heavy
Hitting the point
Where one more
Thing may break One

Some things become
Nearly unbearable
Yet One bears them
And tries not to break

When simplicity
Becomes stupidity
Innocence blown up
Anxiety games tearing
Eyes tearing

How does one
Filter through
Empty words
Words that matter
Words not remembered

Words matter
They have power
One forgets this
One can not
It does not have
To be so hard

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