I don't usually do this daylog thing, but this is the first dream that I've woken up from in a long while, and it's relevant to
noders everywhere.
First of all, it's important to understand that I live in the hood, and our next door neighbor has a habit of playing booty bass music at ridiculous times (3 AM, 10 AM, 4 PM, 9 PM... sometimes I wonder if/when he sleeps). Our walls are pretty solid, but our closets butt up against each other with only a thin wall in between, and that's where he chose to set his sound system up. Now, I like hip-hop (as some of my nodes will indicate), but I don't actually get to hear the music from this guy. What I get to hear is the same buzzing bass effect you get when you're walking past a black sports car with polished silver rims and a gold chain around the license plate. Needless to say, this sucks. When he first started partying up in the middle of the night, I couldn't get him to answer his door (guess he couldn't hear my knocking), so I ended up calling Housing to get him to quiet down. And he did... for a while.
Anyway, I went to bed at around 2:30 AM last night, in a pretty good ego mode after getting my first 3C! writeup. A few minutes pass, and suddenly: BOOM! BABOOM BOOM! BOOM! BABOOM BOOM! I jumped out of bed, ran into the hallway in my boxers, banged violently on the door for a few seconds, and came back in. The music was turned down a tad, but not by much: I had to bang on the wall a few times to get the neighbor to shut up. The entire ordeal got my blood flowing again, and I had to toss and turn for a while just to get to sleep.
I was thinking to myself, "This is bollocks. Next time he starts this shit, I'm getting the campus directory out and calling him up."
calling him up... calling him up... calling him up...
(insert campy dissolve sequence here)
So, the next morning, BOOM! BABOOM BOOM! BOOM! BABOOM BOOM! I grumbled myself out of bed and opened up my laptop to get the dickhead's phone number, but after I had already pressed the power button, I realized the computer was already on. For some reason, it began to restart.
As Windows shut down, I noticed some weird DOS-style messages flashing on the screen, seeming to say things like "This machine has been owned." Dag, I thought, I didn't have a firewall running. The screen went black for a moment, and then the computer began to reboot.
I ended up at a login screen. Not a Windows networking login, mind you, but a weird, Hollywood-style login screen. In addition to my login name, there were a score of other logins available. "Holy mother of fuck. I've been hacked!"
Then, just to keep the Hollywood element going, an instant message window popped up. (I haven't logged in yet, mind you). It was from one of the l33t h4x0rs themselves, whose name I can't remember now (it began with a "J").
He opened with a megalomanic comment along the lines of "Hey! I heard you left your computer on!" I was so angry I couldn't type straight, but I managed to get out a line asking him "What the fuck?!"
To which he responded, "You don't think you can write all those nodes about airplanes and Japanese politicians without looking like a dumbass, now do you?!"
He's from E2! I think. But who is he?
Then, he begins rattling off information he's gathered about me, which turns out to be entirely false but still annoying. He has an extensive dossier on my father saying that the old man is 89 and a native of New York (both wrong). As he says this, I flip through a bunch of legal pads that happen to be lying around my desk (dunno why, I never use legal pads IRL), trying to find something. Anything. The pads were all covered in equations and notes from a million classes I've taken over the last 14 years: one of them even looked like a roll book.
Then I woke up and logged onto E2 to node all of this. I'm convinced that there's some sort of eloquent metaphor for the nodegel in here, but I can't seem to pull it out. My main questions are:
- Who's the hacker supposed to be?
- Why was he giving me lots of incorrect information about myself?
- Why all the friggin' legal pads?
- And why was I looking through them?
Maybe I'll put two and two together after work today, but for now, I've gotta get going.
* No, I don't actually know whether the hacker was male or not.