"Eddie Everywhere", a major media personality from Melbourne who in the past few years has become one rich, famous and omnipresent bastard. McGuire started out as a mere sports reporter but his most famous role has been as host of the popular Channel 9 program The Footy Show. As well as this he commentates the football on television and radio and hosts the Australian version of Who Wants to be a Millionaire?.

However there is more to the man than just his media exploits - he has managed to install himself as President of the Collingwood Football Club and is a prominent memeber of the Australian Republican Movement amongst other things. Having his chubby little fingers in so many pies arouses rage in his enemies, whose constant accusations of conflict of interest are genially dismissed by McGuire as mere envy. Personally I think it's a bit much that he commentates on Collingwood games (yes, he really does).

McGyuire's popularity is such that when Australia held a referendum to decide whether or not to become a republic in 1999, he was touted as a likely first President. He grew up the working class Western suburb of Broadmeadows, a fact which he mentions as often as possible. Of course he now resides in posh Toorak.

McGuire is but 40 years old, and is bound to increase his wealth as time goes by, having his snout in many a trough. Under his presidency the commercialisation of football has reached new heights. Traditionalists are outraged, but they can't wipe the grin off McGuire's fat face as he rakes the dollars in.

Also, the name given to a fat, rich joint by some Melburnian stoners. Roughly the dimensions of a Beazley, but with a greater weed:tobacco ratio.

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