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October 1, 2000
Everything Editor Logs
history | prophecy

Happy Birthday, sensei!

May you live a long and happy life, and become one with the nodegel.



haaappY BIRhtsday sernsee!

Thank you, sensei, for being the kindest voice on Everything.

October 1, 2000
Everything Editor Logs
history | prophecy

Hear o dem bones of this new day within the nodegel.

There are birthday greetings vibrating through the gel. This is the doing of jessicapierce and her Who to send presents to, and when. node.

Time is an interesting aspect of Everything 2. Writeups are timestamped. Some are stamped by their time, are dated moments after they leave New Writeups. From other nodes dangle a long tail of writeups, continuing to explore the issues presented from different perspectives.

Whenever a node is read, it is read now, in the fleeting, dimensionless sliding now of the user.

This is the pivot on which the life and death of nodes may turn. When godusergroup and editorusergroup entities encounter a node, they must ask themselves in that moment and ask of the eternal now of the gel if this is a node for the ages.

If not, it should be released as freegel to be shaped again. If so, it might even be carried to the Page of Cool though it has bobbed unseen in the gel for months.

A strange world.


/tell everyone To everyone who has been everyone to send me birthday greetings: thank you so very much all of you.


I went for a walk this afternoon. It was a beautiful autumn day in New England. In JFK Park down by Memorial Drive, laughing little children played under the trees, young couples in love sat on the grass, and dogs chased frisbees in the afternoon sun. I lit another cigarette, smiled benevolently, and said to myself, "Exterminate the brutes."

  • 10,000,000 hillbillies by Butterfly (long, long gone): "If 10,000,000 hillbillies with 10,000,000 shotguns shot at 10,000,000 road signs you still wouldn't get a halfway decent dirty limerick." If you're going to make a claim like that, you should prove it experimentally.

  • I hate everything Microsoft by Butterfly: "I hate everything Microsoft. I hate everything that Microsoft has ever done. I hate Windows. I hate Internet Explorer. I hate Outlook Express. I even hate Space Cadet. I hate Bill Gates. Hate is a powerful emotion." Indeed, indeed. Thank you.

  • burt newton by Butterfly: "I am Burt Newton. We are all Burt Newton." What? What? Burt Reynolds? Wayne Newton? Burnt Norton? Wayne Krantz? Wayne Kramer? John Wayne? Glyn Johns? John Glenn? Glenn Campbell? Speak up!

  • LT WinModem by Butterfly: Whatever it is, he doesn't like it. This guy's even more full of hate than I am. Jesus . . .

  • Redo from start by Butterfly: Drivel.

  • /dev/null node14 by Butterfly: Meaningless babble.

  • Zen and the Art of Everything by Butterfly: "If you say everything is nothing and nothing is everything then what are you reading?" Nobody said that. "There is no node here" You got one thing right . . .

  • bad limerick by Butterfly: "There was a young upcoming poet Who only wrote three lines of verse And they didn't rhyme". Uh, Beavis? That's not a limerick.

  • the agonizing pain in which I live every day by Butterfly: More of the meaningless babble I have to read every day.

  • ABUSE! ABUSE! by a life in hell: "ABUSE! ABUSE! / (Help! that man is shouting abuse at me!) / ABUSE! ABUSE!" Get it? Huh? Get it? Get it? Sigh . . .

  • Attic dialect by perdedor: "nuke this, I brainfarted, putting in request now..." Another user informs me that it's been like that for weeks. perdedor informs me that he did do a nuke request on several writeups including that one, but that one got overlooked by the god who handled the request. Since it was killed with penalty, I asked a god to bless him (looking back some time later after I got to know the little rodent, I'll give you 10:1 odds he was lying).

  • fucking terrible by CaelDeus (Last seen July 19): "Really really bad. See Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears, N-Sync, Athenaeum etc." Yeah, yeah, yeah . . .

  • ignorant voting by Randofu: He doesn't like it when people downvote his writeups. As usual, it seems to be axiomatic that the downvotes are undeserved.

  • cock fuckers by IvanaTinkle (long gone): "those who get rid of your node without telling you why or that they got rid of it". Just think: Your infantile tantrum could be preserved for all eternity. Darn it, dragoon thinks he got this one. It came up in Random Nodes, and it was a pretty clear target. Unfortunately, the Place of Dead Nodes rolled over for the day before either of us thought to ask a god about who nailed it . . . So we may never know.

Hmph. I'm trying to search for nodes where title ~ /w+h*a+(s+|z+)(u+|a+)(p+|h+)/ but it's not so easy since I can't express it that way.

Nodeshells We Don't Need: 10,000,000 hillbillies

Killed: rayh's writeup in Tolkien Fanatic. Total Content: "That would be me..." Buh-bye.

Killed: smurfbags' writeup in John Ronald Reuel Tolkien. Total Content: "Full name of J.R.R. Tolkien". Sigh. I left the nodeshell, 'cause it would be really cool if someone filled it with something decent hint hint. Or at least put something useful and informative in the J.R.R. Tolkien node...

Killed: DoctorNo's writeup in track. It was a "See Also" writeup, but the user requested the nuke, so there was no penalty.

Killed:: randofu's writeup in Misty, get Starmie out of there!. First it was stupid and juvenile, then it was blank. It was down to -6 when I got to it very soon after its creation. Also nuked the nodeshell.

Zapped Nodeshells: Two created through the everyone account by, one assumes, DMan. The first was DMan was backstabbed by the saintly sensei (methinks the sentence is exactly backwards), and the second was Don't nuke any more of DMan's nodes. It's like hitting a cripple. ("Hitting a cripple"? Sounds like fun. Maybe I'll do it again...)

More Zapped Nodeshells: another one created through the everyone account called why Shanoyu sees Deborah909 as the epitome of everything he loathes about Harvard. Hmm, I think I'd suspect Shanoyu of creating that one.

Nodes Killed

ooblick by bs. Short definition surpassed.
I have nothing to say lately by she_says. Complains about how she has nothing to say. Please, people - we could fill up books with notices of writer's block, and they wouldn't add anything. It really seems like bad NFN when people do this on E2.
The Beastie Boys suck by cantsin. If you don't like a band, it's probably best just to ignore them. But if you must write about it, at least justify your crap.
stabbing children by stuffthings. Truly tastless - which is fine, except for it wasn't very funny anyways. I don't think so.
cheeseburgers by stuffthings. Plural without content.
gun rights by MonkeySpanker. Calling those you disagree with pedophiliacs is the first sign of kookdom, and it'll get your writeup killed. Flames like this don't deserve to stay.
Jon Filbert by nemesis0. Tells us random facts about his friend, and it's his sole writeup. Not any more...
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead by triune and art tatum. mblase's writeup rocks the funky beat, and bs contains the backbeat, while the rest barely rock with redundancy, and are by writers gone and fled. So I put an air bubble into their veins after calling them for vaccines - did I do wrong? Na.
dragon ball Z by d_uncool, rpjimmypop, and wanderer. It's Dragonball Z. One word on that first part. Argh. They weren't great writeups anyways - Starrynight and Melodrame have been asked to move theirs.
k3wl by d_uncool. I really hate it when people use definitions to brag or slag things.
From girl scouts to college sluts: why join a sorority? by rpjimmypop. Same thing, really - try not to slag people on E2, and if you must, provide reasoning, because otherwise I'll kill it like the flamebait it is.
spam. by mobileunit and gunga-din. We don't need definitions with punctuation like this.
cock fuckers by IvanaTinkle. Slags editors using a definition, it's a plural and one line of text with each word linked seperately. The real question is how it's survived so long?
pigfucker by IvanaTinkle. Same crap, same response.
mother fucker by IvanaTinkle. Ditto.
funked by IvanaTinkle. She offended me - the word fuck seemed to be the major part of every writeup.
The Seedy Underbelly of Everything by IvanaTinkle. Links to three offensive nodes - fails to justify its existence.
morons anonymous by IvanaTinkle. More unnecessary hate.
political correctness blows sweaty donkey balls by hoopy_frood and IvanaTinkle. Meaningless flamebait that can't even use E1's level of quality as an excuse. (The fact that I mostly agree doesn't change the fact that you shouldn't drag up issues in such an inflammatory way)
Jhrulith's shell by cozmodiar. Failed my "Like we care?" test, especially when I took the mispelling and fled nature of the noders into account.

Gods - Titles to Edit

b.b. buick is a name to be capitalized, pleaasse?

Gods - Nodes to Delete

Gunmn - a mispelling on my part. Please make... it quick. I don't want it to suffer.

Gods - Nodeshells to Delete

Piffle is a fucking dumbass done by everyone. Personally insulting nodes like this are completely unacceptable. Piffle has merely started out, and will make some mistakes. One hasty node hardly an idiot makes. Believe me, you've made some mistakes, I've made some mistakes (I got yelled at my first day on E2). The fact that it was done anonymously makes it worse - you didn't even have the guts to take responsibility for what you're saying.
stabbing children
john filbert
political correctness blows sweaty donkey balls
morons anonymous
Jhrulith's shell

Gods - Users to Delete

nemesis0 - Nodeless. REMOVED
... - Nodeless.
IvanaTinkle - Nodeless.

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