The European (ok, mainly Italian) PC term to designate a melanin-enhanced person is "extracommunitarian".

Let me explain.

A few decades ago, the vast majority of Italians were melanin-depleted. As years went by, the economic distance between Italy and the countries on the other side of the Mediterranean widened, while the geographic distance remained the same. At the point where the two graphs met, waves of immigrants flooded the Italian borders. Some were just passing by, eager to reach Germany and France; others decided to stay and pursue the Italian Dream1.

Now the first grade school of my little town hosts happy children from every continent of this planet barring Antarctica.

Here's how the press and the common people dealt with the linguistic side of immigration:

  • Old people and skinheads use the Italian version of the n-word (old people usually mean no offence, since many of them were emigrants in their youth; skinheads notoriously have troubles with polysyllabic words).
  • In some regions, people lump all the immigrants under the label "moroccan". Don't ask me why.
  • Since many illegal immigrants work as beach sellers, some genius coined the term "vu' cumpra'" ("wanna buy?"). It's more derisive than derogatory; while it's offensive, it's used by some newspapers.
  • The press imported the term "colored person" from the United States (I have yet to see a transparent person, but I digress). When it was changed to "African-American", Italian journalists were stumped, for obvious reasons.
  • The problem was solved by inventing the word "extracommunitarian". They probably thought that if seven syllables are good for the Yankees, we shouldn't settle for less.

"Extracommunitarian" includes everybody who wasn't born in the European Union; among others:

In reality, the label applies only to poor people. This rules out Mr. Bush and Mr. Ratzinger, most of the Swiss and even Mr. Colin Powell, who remains a colored person. On the other hand, immigrants from Albania are extracommunitarian if they are poor, or Anna Oxa if they are rich.

1. that's to say, eat lots of spaghetti and watch half-naked girls on daytime TV shows. Hey, that's what I do all the time!

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