Final meal requests

Texas Department of Criminal Justice keeps a record on their website of the final meal requests of condemned prisoners dating back to 12/07/1982. The following is a small selection.

Benjamin Stone and Patrick Rogers each drank a Coke, Stacey Lawton asked for 1 jar of dill pickles, James Smith had yogurt, and James Russell just wanted an apple.

David Hicks ordered fish, fries and a soda. Aaron Foust had a cheeseburger, french fries and a Coke. Billy White wanted T-bone steak, french fries and ice cream. Raymond Kinnamon decided on fish, salad, vanilla ice cream and tea.

William Little had fifteen slices of cheese, three fried eggs, three buttered toasts, two hamburger patties with cheese, 2 sliced tomatoes, one sliced onion, french fries with salad dressing, 2 lb. of crispy fried bacon, one quart chocolate milk and one pint of fresh strawberries.

Jeffery Dillingham had 1 cheeseburger with American, cheddar and mozzarella cheese, without mayonnaise, mustard or onions; large french fries; bowl of macaroni and cheese; lasagna with 2 slices of garlic bread; 4 oz. of nacho cheese; 3 large cinnamon rolls; 5 scrambled eggs; and 8 pints of chocolate milk.

41 of the condemned declined a final meal. Four of those requested instead: Justice, temperance, with mercy ; God's saving grace, love, truth, peace and freedom ; Eucharist - Sacrament ; Justice, equality, world peace.

Delbert Teague, Jr. initially declined a final meal. At the last minute, at his mother's request, he agreed to eat a hamburger.

Source :
Texas Department of Criminal Justice web site final meals request page at http://www.tdcj.state.tx.us/stat/finalmeals.htm . The page includes links to other information, such as the criminal record and photograph of each individual.
Update August 4 2007: shaogo has informed me that the webpage cited here no longer exists, and further that the information it contained is no longer available online.

Throughout my life, I have given this matter an awful lot of thought. In fact, sometimes if I am unable to sleep at night or am stuck in a very long queue or some such, I begin to think about such a request.

Now, I am a rather law abiding citizen, I don't do any illegal drugs, I don't drive an automobile, I have no bad temper, don't seem to feel jealousy, don't have any strong political beliefs/causes and don't steal. I don't even use Napster/Morpheus/Kazaa for crying out loud, so the probability that I will be executed is basically zero. A lot of these come from thinking along the lines of "If I died without making love to another woman other than my girlfriend, I wouldn't care, but if I were to die without tasting Foie Gras, I'd really regret it".

I've looked at various websites listing some people's last meal requests. The only thing that seems to be declined is alcohol. In general, it seems a prisoner does not need to pay for their final meals, but I could do so if required (eg to join fight club one must have $300 of personal burial money kept in your left boot, one should also always keep aside $300 of last meal request money in your right boot).

A lot of this thinking began when I watched a Samo Hung movie where he was condemmed to death but had not committed a crime. A lof of the below he recieved (particularly the roast pork/ducks/chickens).

The assumption I am making is that I am death row due to some beaurocratic mistake/framing. If I were on death-row due to a crime I had actually committed or as a prisoner of war, I'd like to believe that I'd take my punishment as a man and ask for bread and water, with a smuggled cigarette for luck and to be shot without a blindfold. However, if the politicians of the day were to let justice not be upheld...sod you all, you can pay for this.

I have particular restaraunts picked out for some of these items. I may add/subtract to/from this list as neccisary. Yes, I am aware that some of the following are quite cruel to animals. I am aware that whales are endangered and am aware that to produce Foie Gras, you must torture a goose it's entire life. Yes, there's Coke, Burger King, KFC here too. Spare me your corporate hatred. There is no veal on this list...only because I don't like it that much. Some notable exceptions to this list are fish (I am allergic), chocolate (I simply don't care for it), some types of alcohol or drugs (I may either have tried them and not enjoyed then or are not interested), about a thousand desserts (there are better things in life than desserts), many fruits/vegetables.

The following to be consumed in one sitting, with vomiting as necessary.

First things first

• 1 Schooner "Toohey's New" beer
• 1 small piece feta cheese
• 1 date
• 1 piece Italian bread rubbed with a clove of raw garlic, drenched with extra virgin olive oil and sprinkled with sea salt
• 1 small bowl spaghetti with extra virgin olive oil, garlic, chilli flakes, parma ham and parmesan cheese

If alcohol were permitted

• 1 bottle Skyy vodka (freezing temperatute)
• 1 bottle Smirnoff vodka (freezing temperatute)
• 12 cans - Toohey's New beer (chilled)
• 12 500mL cans - Heinekin beer
• 1 bottle Baileys Irish Creme liquer
• 6 cans Tsing-Tao beer
• 1 bottle Penfold's Grange Hermatage Shiraz (1966)
• 1 bottle grappa
• 1 bottle sticky desert wine
• 6 pints Newcastle Brown Ale

Beverages

• 2 litres Coca Cola
• 1 litre Dr Pepper
• 4 litres spring water
• 1 can lychee juice
• 1 can grass jelly drink
• 1 can mango nectar
• 1 available tap for tap water

Supplimentaries (I have not smoked in years, but)

• 1 packet 20*(soft wrapper) Marlboro cigarettes
• 1 packet 20*(cardboard box) Marlboro cigarettes
• 1 packet 25*alpine menthol cigarettes
• 1 full corona cigar
• 2 packets PK peppermint gum

Starters

• 6 deep-fried dim sims
• 6 spring rolls
• 12 fried chicken wings
• 1 serving "Karage" Chicken
• 6 Gyoza (meat)
• 1 bowl nachos
• 6 split-stuffed king prawns
• 4 Har Gow
• 4 Siu Mai
• 2 sliced fried bacon
• 2 fried eggs

Main courses

• Truffled Risotto (with appropriate chesses, wines, good stock)
• Truffled Mashed Potato
• Caviar with toast points
• Foie Gras
• Vension (seared, pan de-glazed with red-wine)
• 1 serving BBQ Pork, Wontons, dried egg noodles
• 12 portions Korean Bulgogi beef, wrapped in lettuce with raw green chilli, raw garlic
• 6 KFC wings
• 2 KFC drumsticks
• 1 each KFC thigh/breast piece
• 3 crumbed lamb cutlets
• 1 Burger King Bacon Deluxe Burger
• 1 Big Mac Hamburger
• 1 Chinese style roasted duck
• 1 Crispy skinned chicken (Chinese style)
• 1 Rack Chinese BBQ Pork Ribs
• 1 piece Chinese Roast Pork (Siu Rong ?)
• 2 pieces BBQ Pork
• 10 Yum-Cha Style Chicken Feet
• 2 BBQ Quail
• 1 Hokkien pork/prawn noodle soup
• 12 Chilli-Salt king prawns

Accessories/Snacks

• 3 naan bread
• 1 portion Kim Chi
• 1 portion sweet Korean Pickles
• 1 portion Japanese pickles
• 1 bowl miso soup
• 1 large KFC fries
• 1 orange, one serving cabbage, one slice spam (reference to the Chow Yun Fat movie "Prison on Fire")
• 1 bowl white rice
• 1 large pot chicken broth (Chinese Style)
• 1 bowl Laksa
• 2 slices "cheese bread"
• 50gm mild "Sopressa" sausage
• 50gm hot "Sopressa" sausage
• 12 wontons
• 12 "potsticker" dumplings

Things I want, but don't exist in the real world

• 1 bowl Tampopo Ramen
• 1 deep-fried pikachu
• 1 Woolly Mammoth steak

Extras (things I have never tried before but am curious about)

• 1 small portion whale sushi
• 1 small portion whale blubber (I'm sorry, I truly love whales and wish there were more of them but if I'm going to die, I'll always be wondering)
• 1 very very small portion LUTEFISK
• 1 shot Absinthe
• 1 portion spinal bone marrow
• 1 very very very small portion beef testicle
• 1 portion chanko (what the sumo wrestlers eat)
• 1 pair frogs legs
• 6 escargot
• 1 can Pocari Sweat drink
• 1 small cup pure demi-glace
• 1 deep-fried Mars bar
• 1 deep fried cadbury creme egg
• 1 "shot" heroin
• 1 "line" cocaine
• 1 mezcal worm
• 1 "dose" mezcaline
• 1 ecstacy tablet
• 1 portion haggis
• 1 small portion deep-fried haggis
• 1 portion authentic "chicken fried steak"
• 6 "Water Cherries" (I saw them on TV once)
• 1 "those orange squid things they have hanging up in the BBQ meat places in Chinatown"
• 1 bottle "that really expensive Eurpoean bottled water that gay people drink around these parts"
• 1 durian fruit
• 1 "whatever that old dude who choked on tampopo ate in the restaurant scene that stretched like a metre long"
• 1 Chilli Crab
• 1 Mee Rebus (I saw this on a Singaporean sitcom called "under one roof" and have no idea what it is)
• 1 frozen monkey brain
• 1 serving "Chuck Berry Kool Aid" (I'm from Australia, I have no idea in the world what it is, but I hear so much about it)
• 1 Small Bowl Tuvan Yak Vodka

After Dinner

• 1 portion Emmenthal Cheese
• 1 portion Unpasturized Stilton Cheeze
• 1 after-dinner mint

Dessert

• 2 portions - deep fried ice cream with caramel sauce
• 1 litre - sara lee vanilla ice cream

The finale

• one peking duck pancake with hoi-sin sauce and scallion brush
• one shot Sake
• one kiss from my girlfriend wearing full gothic makeup, black lipstick and wearing sunflowers perfume
• one Marlboro cigarette (think of the film Apocalypse Now)


There, now go ahead and shoot me.