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  • No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats.
  • When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair.
  • If your sister hits, you don't hit back. They always catch the second person doing the hitting.
  • Never ask your three year old brother to hold a tomato.
  • You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
  • Puppies still have bad breath, even after eating a tic tac.
  • Never hold a "dust buster" and a cat at the same time.
  • School lunches stick to the wall.
  • You can't hide broccoli in a glass of milk.
  • Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
  • The best place to be when you are sad is Grandma's house.

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