Guess Who's Coming to Dinner? Bloody Hell, It's an Irishman! is the title given to the controversial "Director's Cut" of a 1947 motion picture directed by Herbert Wilcox, one of Britain's most successful filmmakers, and starring Anna Neagle and Michael Wilding. Broadly, the story is a study of class division and snobbery in Britain in the late Nineteenth and early Twentieth centuries. The re-edited English and American release of the film was entitled The Courtneys of Curzon Street and became the most popular film at the British box office that year, and subsequently one of the most-seen British films of all time with 15.9 million tickets sold in cinemas.

The original "Director's Cut" fared less well, and not only lost money but forced several cinemas into bankruptcy, including one in Galway that was burned to the ground. All known prints of this edit were believed to have been destroyed by outraged cinema-goers up until 1994, when the original negative was discovered in an abandoned production studio in Stockport outside Manchester. It is currently stored in a fireproof vault at the British Film Institute's National Film Archive, as numerous attempts have been made to destroy it by the few people still alive who claim to have seen it.

Synopsis (Spoilers)

Edward Courtney (Wilding), prodigal son of a baronet, shocks class-conscious 1900 British society by marrying Kate O'Halloran (Neagle), his Irish house servant. The film chronicles four decades of their lives together and apart, through the Boer War and both world wars. The "Director's Cut" includes numerous scenes featuring Kate's father played by Irish actor F. J. McCormick (in his final film performance), including the notorious dinner scene that Mr. O'Halloran disrupts. All scenes featuring this character were edited out of the film when it was released as The Courtneys of Curzon Street, and substantial portions of the script were rewritten to remove gay subtext and re-shot at considerable expense with Japanese actors. This synopsis details the differences between the two versions.

The family live on Curzon Street, a high class street in the Mayfair district of London. Kate's father warns her not to work for the Courtney family, as no good can come of it. Kate begins to feel the awkwardness at a musical recital before Queen Victoria, where all the "true ladies" are staring at her and whispering to one another. Later she hears gossip about herself as being part of the "Irish Problem". Edward is an officer in the Horse Guards, but Kate does not realize he cannot return her wave when he is on duty. Heartbroken at the perceived rejection, she irrationally packs her bags and flees without telling Edward. She returns to Ireland where her drunken father berates her abusively, and threatens to kill Edward if she ever sets foot in England again. Meanwhile, Edward departs for India where he accidentally finds the truth about who killed Laura Palmer.

Kate takes up a "career" as a "singer" at the Abbey Theatre in Dublin. Her father visits her backstage to bring her news whilst giving the appearance to everyone else that he doesn't know her. He tells her his wife (O'Shea) is now dead from grief, as she couldn't get over Kate's marriage to and fornication with an Englishman. Kate one-ups him, saying her mother was actually killed at the Battle of Spion Kop. Flashback scenes shot in Africa recount the event without explaining her mother's involvement with the Boer War. Suddenly, the First World War breaks out, and Edward returns from India to look for Kate. She confesses they have a son (Medwin) from that one time they had sex, also called Edward ("Teddy"). They visit him at his boarding school, Clongowes Wood College. Their absence has been rather long, as he is around 27 years old and now teaching there. They all go to dinner at the poshest restaurant in the County Kildare countryside, but are interrupted by Kate's father, raging drunk and reeking of piss. Ethnic and religious slurs are exchanged in anger much to the shock of other diners, and Mr. O'Halloran fires a pistol at Edward. The shot misses and ricochets off a half-dozen shiny metal objects before striking O'Halloran between the eyes, killing him. Suddenly, the war ends.

Edward's father (Mulcaster) dies after being run over in the street by a carriage driven by a belligerent harelip (Tedd), leaving him the baronetcy and turning Kate into the new Lady Courtney. Meanwhile, Teddy has renounced his homosexual boarding school experiences and joined the Army. He becomes engaged and marries before being posted to Bangalore. While his pregnant young wife (Cherry) is reading one of his pornographic love letters home, a singing telegram arrives telling her that he has been killed in action. Devastated, she shoots the telegram singer, then dies giving birth. Edward and Kate raise her son, whom they also name Edward ("Curly"). Edward loses almost everything in the 1929 stock market crash, but they keep their home after Kate resorts to prostitution in Belfast. Suddenly the Second World War begins, and Edward returns to national service as an Army Colonel, and Kate "entertains" the troops. They survive a fire at a dildo factory, and the film ends with their soldier grandson Curly (Watling) coming out as gay and introducing them to his boyfriend. While they are happy that the old class prejudices that threatened their marriage have gone, they are bemused that the unspeakable vice of the Greeks seems to run in the family. Fade to end credits.

Production

The film was produced at the Shepperton Film Studios in Surrey. The title was changed when the film was re-cut and released in England and in other countries, following the intense backlash to the "Director's Cut" when initially screened in Ireland, Scotland, and Wales.

Critical reception

Of the "Director's Cut", The Glasgow Evening Herald wrote "The insulting and offensive romantic drama creaks soggily through three generations, yet manages to provoke both humor and outrage from drunken Irishman stereotypes whilst simultaneously depicting sodomites in an uncritical manner. The poorly-conceived choice to put swear words in the title makes even discussing the film in front of children difficult." The Edinburgh Midnight Sun could not print a review of the film, as their entertainment writer was critically injured during rioting at the fabulous art deco Rutland Cinema on Canning Street in the West End. The Irish Independent published a front-page review that continued across several pages consisting of nothing but curse words. The Western Mail printed a review in the form of a comic strip which was later explained to be a woodcut of a penis.

Cast

Final thoughts

Unfortunately (or not), I haven't been able to see the film, as no new prints of the negative were made after its discovery, and it has remained under lock and key at the BFI archives ever since. Experts have cited "public safety" concerns over releasing copies of the controversial picture, and legal agreements were reached in 1999 to keep the film in protective custody until such time that Her Majesty's government believes it is safe to show to the public, or until 2099, whichever comes first.


LieQuest 2024: A Lie Quest of Mythologically Discordian Proportions

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