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Rules for being high at the office

  1. Make sure the boss is gone to lunch or out for the day
  2. Make sure all the work that needs doing is drudgework, not requiring much thought
  3. Choose your drugs well. Cocaine is no good for a desk job, and alcohol is readily detectable
  4. Time your peaks. You don't want to be too tired by the end of the day
  5. Smile a lot, but not too much
  6. Speak only when spoken to
  7. Don't panic. Nobody knows you're high

That's it. Follow these simple rules, and the hours of wage-slavery will just roll by.

stickin' it to the man since 1997

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