Findings:

• What if I had never met you? How much the poorer would my life have been.
• How long have you been in love with her?
• How many a dispute could have been deflated into a single paragraph if the disputants had dared to define their terms.
• I have never been sure that you knew quite how much I loved you
• And I would have gotten away with it, too, if it hadn't been for you meddling kids!
• It is never too late to be what you would have been
• It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
• you would have been
• I'll look at this in a year and wonder how I could have been so stupid
• How to really brush your teeth (Yes, you have been doing it wrong)
• How to get Apache to tell your visitors when files have moved or been deleted
• If it had been able to, the light would have smiled
• How many lives could have been saved had we just said "Please" more often?
• Front porch, what should have been said
• New zombies have been animated to replace the old
• I would have tried, but Charlotte kept Charlotte in the world of Charlotte and she barely heard me
• You've been a Noder how long? A Completely Token E2versary Pretext for a London Britnoder Picnic
• To a Poet, who would have me Praise certain Bad Poets, Imitators of His and Mine
• What have you been smoking?
• how many lines of code have you written?
• How to have a great vacation in China without money
• The volume of stuff you own is directly proportional to how far you have to move
• How to check if someone has been to the mall
• Your radical ideas about many things have already occurred to others but have never been articulated in a fashion so accessible to current generations
• What is it like to have a crush on someone?
• Coloring your name in Quake 3
• We are the ones we have been waiting for
• I have a small penis. How can I sexually pleasure a woman?
• Animals that should not have been domesticated
• How can I need kisses I have never felt?
• How can an atheist have morals?
• I might have expected that the mushrooms would worship you
• How and why do we (humans) have culture?
• Phone books have never been this exciting!
• I would a thousand times rather have had a simple cheap sandwich with a friend
• How to develop one side of your butt and still have the other one flabby
• you have never been safe
• If you or a loved one have been injured or killed
• do you remember the disco rhombus? it must have all been a dream.
• Advice I have been given about girls
• i have been burning for so long
• Few things ruin a romantic evening like finding your car has been towed
• You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
• We have been shown the plan only insofar as it concerns ourselves
• I may or may not have been naked
• I would have cooled this if you had written it
• if music was a woman you would have a mistress
• How to have fun in post-Civil War New York
• My entire life I have been composing my death poem
• Is this what I have been seeking? Or is it an echo, a remnant, a sign that I was wrong?
• Terminating a pregnancy due to Down Syndrome
• How many genes do we (humans) have?
• I know I have been dreaming
• These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
• You stole what they would have given you
• Final moments lost to what should have been
• Laugh when you have been listening well
• If Gore Had Won (A cautionary tale)
• How to Pretend to Have a Job
• Have you ever been illusioned?
• Have you ever been so excited about your life that it makes you almost want to cry?
• How to have plausible deniability if caught in a medical situation involving rectal insertion.
• How do you know if you have a sinus infection?
• Life is material; you just have to live long enough to figure out how to use it
• What pornos would have us believe
• war trophies for people who have never been to war
• Could I Have Been?
• I have gone too far. I have been thinking, this is my life. Well, not yet.
• I have always been burning
• They are angry and they have been lied to
• I have not been entirely truthful with you. I did gagoogidy that girl. I gashmoygadied her gaflavity with my googus.
• Could Muhammad have been autistic?
• How to check if someone has been through it all
• Movies that should have been books first
• How to make a mailman's job more entertaining
• Conrad wants to know what I have been dreaming. This might get complicated.
• you've been through something that no one should have to go through
• Wedding invitations for people who have been divorced for years
• Why have there been no great women artists?
• Advantages an invisible man would have in the world
• What Might Have Been
• If you didn't have free will, would you know it?
• How to tell when you have really messed up your relationship
• How to find something which has been lost
• I have been showing you what a warrior is not.
• It Must Have Been the Roses
• Grief, killing grief, have not my torments been
• All Girls Should Have Been Born Blonde
• That icky feeling when a client calls with a downed server and you have no clue how to fix it
• He's been places they have not.
• A time when a gun might have been helpful
• I have been alone while I was with many girls
• How does the Military Selective Service Act apply to individuals who have had a sex change?
• The path we have been walking
• And All That Could Have Been
• It could have been me
• If we catapulted outlaws, only pawn shops would have guns
• How we have grown apart
• I would have liked thunder when she left
• How to "Have People"
• Hello, my name is... Would you like to have sex?
• How to have an out of body experience
• Sex in a small car
• Things that would have seemed unbelievable about 11 years ago
• I would like to have emotions
• Why would he want a writer when he could have a dancer?
• The bong on the table must have been part of the scenery
• If it were a snake, it would have bit me
• Would ye have a young Virgin of fifteen Years
• You, standing
• How to have a Scotch Tasting
• Things that have never been said in the entire history of man
• Do not be surprised, I have always been your canvas, Argenis.
• Could have beens, should have beens
• These fragments I have shored against my ruin:
• Why the ancient Babylonians would have loved high definition television
• The classic Warner Brothers cartoon characters have been replaced by lookalikes
• You have been paroled from participation in the Capitalist Project
• Gap analysis of a telephone call
• when I am King, we will have no such things, but, my lads, if the old king my father were dead, we would be all kings.
• I would have leapt at the innuendo you had strewn at my feet.
• How to have an epileptic fit
• How many geniuses have we lost this way?
• I don't have a postmodern condition; I've always been like this
• Names have been changed
• I have just been shot
• We Have Always Been The Party Of No
• AES may have been broken
• I have been thinking about kissing. A lot.
• I have been enslaved to imaginary Berlins my whole life. (dream) mp3 (recording)
• Some liberties have been taken with dialogue
• I have been orbiting this planet for thirty-seven years, and am just now starting to experience reentry (document)
• I cannot produce a definitive list of everywhere I have been, but I can say that I have seen a whole lot of nowhere
• Like hands on a clock tell time without thinking about how long it's been
• The eyes of the dead may not blink, but they have been known to wander
• The way things have always been done
• You have been in every line I have ever read
• Boy, have you been having those dreams of yours again?
• Our minds bend and twist in the wind, our bodies fall apart, and the ghosts we leave behind have only one question: Where Have You Been?
• The cat (rumination of all that could have been)
• It has been said that democracy is the worst form of government except all the others that have been tried.
• Are you searching to be inspired? Or are you searching to be amused, be content, be happy? What could you have been?
• The smell of kittens that have been careless; the flowers and the beer cans emerging from the snow.
• You haven't seen it and you don't understand. I have malice. I have cruelty. The little fire that's always been inside me isn't so little anymore.
• I could have been Canadian
• It could have been a Brilliant Career
• Have you been a dad today?
• I should have been a pair of ragged claws scuttling across the floors of silent seas.
• we're part of something bigger than any one of us. i just feel lucky to have been chosen.
• if a cycle can be broken, then it will have been worth it
• I have been enslaved to imaginary Berlins my whole life.
• Hello lovely fool where have you been all this time.
• How Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man have sex
• I could have been one of a two
• A part of us remains wherever we have been.
• our voices, once clarion, have been muted by time and mortgages
• Every morning when I wake up, I feel guilty for all the things I have ever been
• Oh well, I guess I'll have to stain the world with darkness until my bloodlust has been quenched.
• You will be a tear-stained diary entry, and it will have been all your fault
• The "How many partners have you had" question
• Strangers have been, and continue to be, very kind to me. Thank you.
• If this were in person, I would have kissed her now
• Sex with a chicken
• I have to wonder how this can be a metaphor for my life
• How the mighty have fallen
• Do unto others as you would have others do unto you
• How can we have a Y2K problem in a country with both Microsoft and Intel?
• For future reference, when in eternity or insanity; dreams I would like to have
• I am not gay. I have never been gay.
• Having an S on a transcript rather than a B
• The Manual (How to Have a Number One the Easy Way)
• Nodes your Grandma would have liked
• all that time, all those threads, weaving through something that must have been far too confusing to enjoy
• So - you've been making love to me ten thousand miles away - how tantalizing.
• Let's go, keys. I've been drinking vodka and have a lot of big ideas.
• I always knew I would have a 21st birthday but I never thought I'd be 21
• a bad day is when I lie in the bed and think of things that might have been
• We are the people we have been waiting for.
• I must have been mental to have done something like that, eh?
• For all sad words on tongue or pen, the saddest are these: "It might have been."
• How to say "No" and have people listen
• How many "Spinal Tap" drummers have died, in total?
• All the terrible disadvantages an invisible man would have in the world
• I appear to have been misinformed
• should have been an artist not a software engineer
• CAUTION: Warning signs have not been installed

If you Log in you could create a "How entertaining would my ruin have been?" node. If you don't already have an account, you can register here.