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So this Screwdriver walks into a bar, and the bartender exclaims, 'Hey, we got a drink named after you!!' And the Screwdriver replies, 'You've got a drink named Murray?'
One of the rarer of accolades which may be bestowed on someone is to have a drink named in their honour. So, you may be wondering, how can regular joes and janes like ourselves reach this pinnacle point? There are, it seems, a few paths.

1. Be the creator of the spirit. For example, there was once (around 300 years ago) a French Benedictine monk who, amongst his monkly duties, undertook to develop new varieties of wine. The result of his efforts? Champagne. The monk's name? Dom Pierre Perignon.

2. Be really famous in a way in which people will think of a drink being named for you as likely a tasty treat. Like the actress, Rita Hayworth, for whom was named a mix of tequila, triple sec, and lemon or lime -- but the bartender used her full name for it: Margarita. On an unrelated note, Ms. Hayworth was inspiring enough for Stephen King to make her a title character in his short and gritty prison story, Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption. Then there's the violet-eyed Joan Collins -- vodka, grapefruit juice, club soda, and a pinch of sugar. No telling why people thought golfer Arnold Palmer* would make a good name for sweet tea and lemonade (or why fellow golfer John Daly would make a good name for the same plus vodka in honour of Daly's wilder reputation). On the other hand, the innocence of Shirley Temple and the geniality of Roy Rogers made for the use of their names in alcohol-free concoctions (ginger ale and grenadine, originally, for Ms. Temple; later substituted with commercial clear sodas, and with cola for Mr. Rogers).

Some famous names for drinks come from those who have conquered, and then been conquered. Napoleon has a style of brandy named for him; and Mary I of England (and not Mary, Queen of Scots, as I'd errantly thought) was alcoholically commemorated for her bloody reign. Both were upended, in the end -- but where are the drinks named for the successful conquerors who died in their sleep and passed kingdoms on to their heirs? Oh well, there is the lesser-known Bloody Caesar to represent that crowd -- with vodka and clamato jolted with Worcestershire and Tabasco.

3. Be a made-up name which simply sounds good for a drink. There never was a Harvey Wallbanger, nor a real Tom Collins for whom the drinks are named; though long-lived rumour has the first, at least, named for a clumsy surfer who would hit the walls with his board as he skeeted out to catch some rolling giants.

So, there are your best bets right there: invent the drink, be famous and have a drink-sounding name, or be made-up with a drink-sounding name. Don't know about you, but I'm betting on inventing over the other options.


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* misterfuffie informs me "Arnold Palmers are so named because he made people outside of the deep south aware of them. Lot of places down there they're called a "50/50" and nobody knows who the hell Arnold Palmer is."

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