or A List of Things I Could Easily Do Without:
1. After hours and weeks of filling out forms for financial assistance, numerous probing interviews, dental and doctors' appointments, in one phone call behind my back, the youngest stepdaughter almost ruined our new routine by requesting a visit to the Adult Day Care, plus pushing for a five-day visit for her Dad to go to Brooklyn. The last time he went, she didn't give him his meds on time, left him alone, and he called me late every night wanting to know where "the boys and I and our cats were."
2. Her older sister decided to visit from Colorado and they both barraged me with texts and emails intended to make me feel bad. I took a step backward and didn't respond in the heat of the moment, then read all of the exchanges to my husband, who got angry. Took us three hours to craft a response from me regarding the policies of the ADC, the one grant that is very specific in terms of attendance and time period, plus my husband's feelings regarding their plans, which also coincide and conflict with our 28th wedding anniversary.
3. Apparently they complained to both of his sisters so I had to field phone calls from both of them, defending doctors' orders regarding medication, consistent ADC attendance which he loves, looks forward to going and feels like it's his new job. I have tried to keep all of them appraised of updates, but it seems not to matter.
4. Day visit one started out very upbeat with just older stepdaughter. Both sons were here working and we took a family photo. I was determined to stay positive, which lasted about one hour. (I had asked both of his daughters prior to Father's Day if they could contribute anything towards the ADC, which is not covered by Medicare nor secondary health insurance.) Here is where the bullshit began.
5. Older stepdaughter claimed they had just bought their first house and mortgage payments were high. Younger stepdaughter did not even respond. Both sons had cautioned me not to ask, offering to help, no problem. I feel they help in other ways and are paying off student loans, plus are supportive on difficult days.
6. Older stepdaughter talked A LOT about a thoroughbred racing horse she bought and was "sending to Horse Summer Camp" this week, plus paying someone else to feed, groom, train, and board since last February. This was in direct contradiction to what she had told us over the phone. Still trying to stay positive, I didn't say a negative thing, wanting my husband to enjoy the time with her.
7. As they were leaving for two nature destinations, then lunch, I overheard him say "I hope you know how to drive because I'm not supposed to anymore." Broke my heart. I had missed my workout time so I did laundry and watered plants, stayed home since I wasn't sure when they would be coming back.
8. They returned four hours later, my husband exhausted. She didn't want to drive back to Brooklyn during rush hour, so she hung out here and complained about the food at the restaurant I'd suggested, which had a vegetarian menu as well as burgers. She hasn't seen her father for two years and is complaining about paying for a $9 hamburger.
9. My husband got into pajamas and went to sleep, waking at 8pm, asking if it was time for him to "go to work". I said, "No, dear, it's the same day. Why don't you sit up and I'll bring you dinner on a tray while we watch America's Got Talent?" His eyes brightened and he looked at me with such simple hope. "I do go to work tomorrow though, right?"
10. Currently, we're awaiting both of his daughters, who just called to say they're running late. I thanked them for calling, said he's been up for hours, and that I had to be somewhere at noon. My husband was reading Harold and the Purple Crayon. I explained to him they would be late so he's now napping until they arrive.