Findings:

• I'll be happier when the rain stops. But I know I'd be miserable if it never rained again.
• I always knew I would have a 21st birthday but I never thought I'd be 21
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• I don't know about that fellow Rand, but I'd never trust a McNally.
• Depressing but probably true rules of life
• God was a Lost Guest
• you laugh and then you cry but you're still laughing but you miss her so damn much
• I was never any good at maths at school
• Of Gods and Men: Who Was This Man Called the Christ?
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• the ocean is never calm and still, but the depths are very different from the surface
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• I was not made for love songs, and love songs will never be made for me.
• I never faced existential quandaries as an addict
• There was never supposed to be an Episode 7, 8, or 9
• God Damn Robot, Episode I: The Phantom Mess
• Yeah I can love my fellow man; but I'm damned if I'll love yours.
• always morning, but never breakfast
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• your chances of being killed by a frog are low BUT NEVER ZERO
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• If I was beautiful, I'd know it
• I was addicted to parents
• If I were watched alone, I'd be considered insane
• A poem for two pages of panel art for a comic that was never written
• you never once told her how beautiful she was nor how much you truly loved her
• A watched pot never boils
• I Thought My Father Was God
• How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
• Forever blue, but never black
• She could hit four octaves above high-C, but she never performed in public
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• If a system is given nothing but a steady supply of unconditional self-affirmation, it will never see an impetus to cure its ills
• I may never be queen, but you will never break me
• The Box Said 'Do NOT Open" But The Seal Was Already Broken
• It was a dream. But it wasn't a dream.
• I was in heaven, I was in hell. Believed in niether but feared them as well.
• The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• That man was a sock puppet on the hand of God.
• I REALLY hate this god damn robot
• when god speaks, it is never one-sided
• I never dreamed I'd need so many people
• I'd love you if I'd never been born
• I'm sorry, I didn't realize God was on campus today
• It was all God's fault
• I can never be sure if it was real or just another illusion
• I was Dan for fifteen minutes and I never want to be Dan again
• Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few
• I never even went to Las Vegas, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt
• some say he was never here at all
• The Epidemic That Never Was
• I had never known someone whose death was imminent
• Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs
• There but for the grace of God go I
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• Girls possess me but they're never mine.
• I'm so goddamned cruel to you. But you'll never know
• I've never seen a glacier up close, but I've touched your hand. It felt so cold.
• I'm not a god, but I'm working on it
• But if life were only moments, then you'd never know you had one
• God Sees The Truth, but Waits
• you never felt her hot blood on your face but, hey, who's keeping track
• I was burned and bleeding, but the galaxy still spun on
• I'm not religious, but I think I have a close relationship with God
• I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you
• Starve, but not for the glory of inner gods of determination
• words I've wanted to tell you but never seem to be able to
• We All Get Old, But We Never Grow Up
• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• I was shaking, but not from the cold
• There is no god but God
• i can't fit it all in but by god, i will keep trying
• I can burn the hearts of the damned, but I can't stop the burning I feel for you
• Once upon a time there was light in my life, but now there's only love in the dark
• Noding for Numbers sure was silly, but it sure is better than Dada Fascism
• God Damn it!
• i thought i was special, but it was you
• /but what was the question?
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• I hate this god damn robot
• I'd like to thank God for allowing me
• God was creepier than I expected so I took it out on the little people
• If God was willing to let it be
• Which God was cooler, the one from the Old Testament or the one from the New Testament?
• A God Damn Robot Christmas
• If this was an Olympic Sport, I'd be world champion
• If I didn't ask, I'd never know (how much you hate me)
• Two of them. Hovering there like bloated gas giants in the heavens. Good God, it was beautiful.
• If I was a woman I'd be a feminist too
• Would I have hid myself away if I had known I'd never be found?
• I thought what I'd do was, I'd pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes
• I never thought I'd have something to say
• God was in the west too, at one time.
• The real reason pi was never calculated to a high precision in ancient times
• There was just the magic I'd brought and laid there over the years, piled up in the corners like twinkling dust bunnies
• Nostalgic for a time that I never experienced and for a person I never was
• Tribute to the Man Who Never Was (document)
• She was never mine. I always shared her.
• I was never broken
• Most of these things I've never seen in real life. Only on screens. Or Elsewhere. I'd die without it.
• Despite her station, the quarry was never alone
• the little friendship that never was
• A Woman Who Never Was
• I was the man who never lied. I never lied until today.
• There never was a body that gave the undertaker a tip
• i kept dreaming of a world i thought i'd never see, and then one day i got in
• Man was created in God's image
• Damn everything but the circus!
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• Questions you never asked, but now that I mention it, yeah, that's a good point
• executed but never exposed
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• I'd ask, sure, I'd ask. But then, then you could say no.
• It's not so much that I like him as a person God, but as a boy he's very handsome
• If Thou But Suffer God to Guide Thee
• Ladies and gentlemen, I play piano, but god is in the house tonight.
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• They were looking for God but found religion instead
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• Skim this life but never live
• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• Gods exist but will only talk to those who stay awake after bedtime under the covers.
• I call, but I never talk. I knock, but I never enter. I feel a bit insecure.
• I might not believe in God, but I sure as hell believe in the power of prayer
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• For every rich man who tries to leave this world for a better one with his fancy tomb surrounded by mourners, there are many more who perish alone in the cold, forgotten by all but God.
• There was silence in my heart, but you found a way to break it.
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• curiosity killed the cat, but it never hurt me
• I don't believe in God or the soul but these machines can make me cry
• forever falling, but never losing altitude
• I'd love to stay and let you break my heart, but I have laundry to do
• He comforted me when he thought I needed it, but never when I really did
• There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
• Your radical ideas about many things have already occurred to others but have never been articulated in a fashion so accessible to current generations
• The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever.
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• you never thought this would happen to you, but it did
• we can give up, but the world never will
• You can check out any time you like, but you can never leave.
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• All gods but your own
• Eyes are the windows to the soul, but there are some windows that should never be opened
• I've been offered a lot for my work, but never everything.
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• Unloved, yeah. But I'd rather be cursed than poisoned.
• we went to the stars, but all we found was ourselves
• I never wanted to burn any bridges. But I did want to light some fires.
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• but fuck, it was Sunday and the church bells hadn't even called the faithful
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• I will tell you the phrase, but you must never speak it out loud. If you do, you will surely die.
• No matter what I did to fix it, the damn thing never got everything right
• God damned sons of bitches
• I could never draw but they made me an artist
• the fire burned and burned; it was so great and now so much time has passed and the fire is still burning, but it requires attendance
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me
• Junk mail never has to spell your name right, but important stuff does
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• god damn the sea (user)
• I'd like to thank my parents, Ayn Rand and God
• God was created in man's image
• A little Clint Black never killed anybody, but it did evacuate the building.
• God Damn You, Professor Mysterious!
• It never rains but it pours
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• I'd already be a Buddhist if it weren't for all these damn spiders
• So I was balls deep in the guy's ass that night when he turns to me and asks for a kiss. Damn. What a fag.
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit

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