Findings:

• You have exactly two minutes left of your life
• Oh well, I guess I'll have to stain the world with darkness until my bloodlust has been quenched.
• How many lives could have been saved had we just said "Please" more often?
• Make the computer work? I'll need two black candles and a chicken.
• I could have been one of a two
• I'll pretend I just cursed myself by saying this, so when it doesn't happen I have something to fall back on other than you
• All of your ideas have already occurred to others. Please stop bothering to think. You are selfishly wasting energy and oxygen.
• My soul is in a million pieces. I tried to collect most of them, but some are missing, and the ones I have don't fit together anymore. Feel free to take a piece or two.
• The FOOLS! They laughed at my theories at the university, but I'll have my revenge! I'll have my REVENGE!
• Of course I'll love you forever, provided we have sex right now
• I'm probably the best lover I'll ever have
• two guys who have killed scores of imaginary people
• To anyone who this may have hurt, please forgive me. The darkness keeps calling and I must go.
• I'll look at this in a year and wonder how I could have been so stupid
• Please sir, may I have some more?
• With your feet in two separate boats, I'll push you away so you won't fall in
• There's a sign on the wall. But she wants to be sure. Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
• I'll keep calligraphy (you can have the flying spaghetti monster)
• I'll spot you one friend, or two chair legs
• please come stay with me in the forest so at least i have one person with whom i have no secrets
• Why we have two ears
• Two virgins about to have sex
• I will take one ticket please to whatever you have to say please keep talking
• No, but I'll have a beer
• Do I have to watch my step at every turn?
• have
• How Pac-Man and Ms. Pac-Man have sex
• I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you
• Know your pets
• Prices should have no more than 2 significant digits
• It's better to regret something you HAVE done
• We Have Explosive
• Have you tried rebooting?
• If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns
• Justice and piety have vanished
• Have you found Jesus?
• What we've got here is a failure to communicate
• progression by two
• Have a nice day
• We read your mail so you don't have to
• I Have No Mouth, and I Must Scream
• Man's desire to blow shit up, and to have a nice attache case
• I did not have sexual relations with that woman
• You have a big finger
• Did God have choice in creating the universe?
• Even God doesn't have the right to utterly destroy children
• I have no faith in your God
• What have you
• Citizen: You have committed an error
• Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned
• Karl Marx must have had a lousy job
• You do not have a right to not be offended
• Girls Just Want to Have Fun
• New zombies have been animated to replace the old
• I must have left my soft, gooey centre in my other pair of pants
• I have never let my schooling interfere with my education
• The tattoo phenomenon
• Sally guests I have known
• I have a dream
• The US does NOT have Freedom of Speech
• Baptist jokes
• Baptist fear of dancing
• A letter to those who have impressed me
• What is it like to have a crush on someone?
• I have heard the mermaids singing
• When I have female children
• I have no complaint
• Times when you MUST have a smoke
• Eskimos do NOT have 40 words for snow
• I have a good idea, smear crap on your face
• What have you been smoking?
• Who needs another person when you have yourself?
• I have seen the elephant
• What do you need to transfer to say you have transferred your mind?
• Have a buck
• Congratulations, you have eliminated all forms of hospitable life
• I have a tricorn hat
• Nodes your Grandma would have liked
• Somewhere I have never travelled, gladly beyond
• Why males have nipples
• Feminists have acquired nuclear weapons
• They have potential, if they only applied themselves
• We're trying to have a baby
• If this were in person, I would have kissed her now
• Why couldn't it have been an action picture that had just started?
• The number you have dialed is imaginary
• Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died
• you can't have it both ways
• How to have fun in post-Civil War New York
• You have much to learn, Grasshopper
• You have no socially redeeming value
• Let them have Festivas
• The "How many partners have you had" question
• When we have reached the end of time and light
• Do law-abiding citizens have the right to an opinion on criminal penalties?
• Animals that should not have been domesticated
• it's good to have a moose
• We atheists have a good sense of humor
• What face did you have before your mother and father were born?
• I have no browser and I must node!
• I laughed the loudest, who'd have known?
• Yes! We have no bananas!
• Walking into class, only to realize that you have no pants
• Here We Have Idaho
• When I have Fears that I may Cease to Be
• Have I Got News for You
• Haves and Have-Nots
• Dreamy things people have said to me
• You have 1 writeups until level 3
• I have asked my library to ban a book
• You have far too much time on your hands
• Sex with a chicken
• I have this delusion
• I don't have a television set
• You can't have everything. Where would you put it?
• Lord, have mercy
• Your radical ideas about society, individualism, and religion have already occurred to others
• Questions I have had today
• Animals people have sex with
• I have a most elegant proof of that, but this node is too small to contain it
• Your radical ideas about religion as a mechanism of social control have already occurred to others
• I have lots of gay friends
• Phone books have never been this exciting!
• Let's all have an orgy!
• Eat well, shit strongly, and you shall have no fear of death!
• There are worse things than to have a great injustice done to you
• Scientists who have genetically designed their children for superior 'fros
• I have a friend
• I have to wonder how this can be a metaphor for my life
• A song has a lyric, songs have lyrics
• the innocent have nothing to fear
• Should you have to understand lyrics to enjoy music?
• I HAVE NO CAPS LOCK KEY AND I MUST NOT SHOUT
• Why do girls only want to have "serious" relationships?
• You have got hold of the wrong end of the stick
• Have you Meta Moderated Today?
• A list of things kids should and should not have from a woman who has no kids
• Where have all the Merrymakers gone?
• That whole bedroom thing wouldn't have happened if you hadn't tried to explain Quantum Physics
• What Have They Done to the Rain
• What Have They Done to the Rain?
• And that's why I won't have sex with you
• You really have nothing to say, do you?
• A thought that may have passed in the mind of the busboy at the cafe where I often find myself
• Sarah Michelle Gellar may have seen my underwear
• Coloring your name in Quake 3
• Rampant mass consumerism is so evil. Hey, can I have a sip of that Frappucino?
• Do not have sex with horses. Seriously, don't.
• The Manual (How to Have a Number One the Easy Way)
• Why Buddhist countries do not have the death penalty
• The best phone call I could have made tonight
• Skinny people have it bad, too

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