I know exactly how to please me.
I'm always in the mood when I'm in the mood.
I will never get pleasure from any one man as many times as I've pleasured myself.
I can have sex with myself anytime, and it's not considered cheating!
I know everything that there is to know about me.
I might lie to myself, but I'll never betray myself.
I will never abandon myself.
I talk to myself, but we never fight.
We've spent our entire lives together.
What more could you ask for? You need to appreciate yourself as a lover before anyone else will!