Findings:

• She didn't write like Emily Dickinson, but she did live in a house overlooking a cemetery, and I guess he thought that was important.
• Why I didn't get my driver's license until I was 18
• I'm sorry I was speeding, officer, but I really have to get to the hospital
• I didn't read it but I want to get into the author's pants
• I didn't have the heart to tell him I was lying about taco night, but at least the hellhound made some friends
• I didn't know how to keep it but I couldn't throw it away.
• There was silence in my heart, but you found a way to break it.
• Somebody told me a story. It was pretty but boring. It was Saturday night, my stories usually end up that way.
• Too cool for school, too dumb to get a job
• I didn't ask if the glass was half full or half empty. I've always had enough to drink.
• The gun is good. The penis is evil. The penis shoots seeds, and makes new life, and poisons the earth with a plague of men, as once it was. But the gun shoots death, and purifies the earth of the filth of brutals. Go forth and kill!
• In Which Ethel Gao Gets Off His Butt and Accepts the Call
• the desert was once alive, but I don't remember it
• It was a dream. But it wasn't a dream.
• The Marlboro Man died of cancer, but he wasn't a rocket scientist when he was healthy, ha ha ha.
• Once upon a time there was an ocean but now there is a mountain range.
• I am sorry but when you were talking I was admiring the shape of your lips and evaluating their kissability
• But I've said it before and I'll say it again: kneecaps only exist to get hit with claw-hammers; grace only exists to be fallen from.
• but you had his eyes and that was sort of almost enough
• Seems I might have stolen the blue part of her rainbow, but all I really did was make it bigger, a way bigger blue
• I'm sorry, I didn't realize God was on campus today
• When you get to the top, I know what it'll seem like. But there IS someone there. There IS someone there.
• You thought the silent treatment was as cold as it could get
• Sympathy for the Mongols & How The Rise of the West was just sheer Dumb Luck
• I didn't know such things when I was young
• I get knocked down, but I get up again
• Jessica, too tall but still lovely, was not sure she would or should drop the whale
• strange and too short but I was lonely
• i didn't write this, but i wish i had
• I told her I could read her mind, but she didn't believe me. I could tell.
• I was burned and bleeding, but the galaxy still spun on
• She really does want to clap along, but at the same time she doesn't want to let the bird get out.
• I was shaking, but not from the cold
• The real horror was not what had been redacted, but the reasons why.
• Can I play with your breasts? Yes, but don't get out of the yard.
• one was giving me the eye but nothing came of it
• I was in heaven, I was in hell. Believed in niether but feared them as well.
• I was pretty sure that wasn't how slasher films were supposed to end, but you won't see me complaining.
• It was hormones, it was hormones, but it was valid
• He stretched out his arms but she was not there
• The last girl I dated was a vegetarian. We couldn't go anywhere and so it just didn't work out.
• Noding for Numbers sure was silly, but it sure is better than Dada Fascism
• The girl didn't know if she was loved until he said yes.
• She was watching me and I didn’t know it.
• The Box Said 'Do NOT Open" But The Seal Was Already Broken
• When someone was willing to drown with me, I really didn't want to drown anymore
• The sound was starting to get stuck in my head like "It's a Small World"
• I thought he was a man but he was just a little boy
• Things you don't want to hear (but will) when you get into bed with a girl
• English may be a "living language," but Latin is not -- so get it right.
• I died for Beauty -- but was scarce
• They wrote it all in perl but it was mostly system calls
• 1991-96 were more fun years, but I'll likely get more accomplished in the year 2000 alone
• It did not get nicer, but it sure got a hell of a lot more honest
• I was once smaller than a jellybean, but now look at me - I am macroscopic!
• I suppose I could have married a World Cup soccer player, but I didn't
• How Gudrun cast herself into the Sea, but was brought ashore again
• I considered cutting my toenails, but they're my only natural defense
• I learned never to empty the well of my writing, but always to stop when there was still something there in the deep part of the well, and let it refill at night from the springs that fed it.
• I'm at the station, but I can't get on the train
• He was born with the gift of logic but the inability to use it
• I bought an orange, but it was a grapefruit
• The Firestone dealership was full to the brim with cars. But I reasoned I would need a boat, since my desire was to go to Ireland. Just then a harsh reminder surfaced; water is expensive in hell.
• It wasn't so much what you said, or what I did, but more what you said I did, and what I didn't say at all.
• The flowers smiled, but she was gone
• I appreciate your concern for others, but I need to get all my ducks in a row first.
• A person is smart, but people are dumb, panicky animals
• He had fallen in love, but I'm pretty sure the hellhound was only in it for the belly rubs
• It wasn't so much a trip down memory lane as it was me carjacking someone's memorymobile and speeding off down the freeway, but I digress.
• I didn't mean to write this, but this is how it came out
• We All Get Old, But We Never Grow Up
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• Once upon a time there was light in my life, but now there's only love in the dark
• I can get away with murder, but I can't get you out of my head
• /but what was the question?
• but fuck, it was Sunday and the church bells hadn't even called the faithful
• The virgin was looking apprehensive about the whole ordeal, but for the right amount of cash anyone will take on a horse
• The bastards got me but they won't get everybody
• I thought I had some great insight into human nature, but I didn't
• i thought i was special, but it was you
• Sex just walked by me, and I didn't get any, dammit
• I didn't want to know where I was conceived
• In Defense of the Dumb
• the fire burned and burned; it was so great and now so much time has passed and the fire is still burning, but it requires attendance
• How will you know you didn't get it all wrong?
• Why didn't you just get a dog?
• The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist
• we went to the stars, but all we found was ourselves
• I don't know what he was listening for, but he wasn't listening
• When I was a kid, I wanted to get tuberculosis
• nor was there anything to be attained that you didn't already have
• There was a lot of blood, but the boys needed it
• I don't know where he gets his words but I like them
• I got the feeling the Fairy Council was mad at me when the president knocked over her coffee to get a better grip on my neck
• What was I thinking when I said it didn't hurt?
• I can't get a girlfriend but my dog has a harem
• She didn't know what outside was anymore.
• as you get older, a lot falls away. but i am not here to tell you not to worry. i am here to give you tools.
• Oh, no. Look, you've gone and made me optimistic. I was before, but now it is showing.
• It all turned out all right but there was so much pain along the way
• It would have been an excellent story but I had to get off the train
• I can't get published, but this crap can
• But who codes the coders?
• butt naked
• I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you
• Mr. Butts
• Words that sound dirty but really aren't
• There is no god but God
• Every Which Way but Loose
• That'd be the butt, Bob
• Friends and lovers, but sometimes just friends
• Butt hinge
• Butt joint
• But thanks for playing
• There are many like it, but this one is mine
• I'm no fucking Buddhist, but this is Enlightenment.
• I may not know anything but I know I'm not American
• But my computer really IS possessed
• I know there are other fish in the sea but I don't want them
• Butt crack of dawn
• Lots of MIPS but no I/O
• Things people put up their butts
• Project B.U.T.T.
• It's not so much that I like him as a person God, but as a boy he's very handsome
• I'm not anorexic, but I'm working on it
• I don't want to be a weeping mass of emotion, but I am
• Poetry you found that you wrote when you were ten but secretly still like
• You wouldn't know it, but I think you're achingly beautiful
• Something Childish, but Very Natural
• I have a most elegant proof of that, but this node is too small to contain it
• Sororities are nothing but social crutches
• butts ARE litter
• You may think I'm lying, but it's true
• But what are they really thinking?
• Why is there always money for war, but not for education?
• I am no doubt moving. The question now is not where, but how. My life changes everyday. Big deal.
• I love you, I want you, but you are a cruel monster
• But I digress
• If I could slip this skin but for a moment
• Sorry, but I AM my fucking khakis
• My library books are late, but I don't care
• BQN: But, one for all?
• Sexist jokes
• Yard Butt
• Figures don't lie, but liars can figure
• Not really by the rules, but...
• No, but I'll have a beer
• Free but worthless shares
• Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me
• Junk mail never has to spell your name right, but important stuff does
• I know you are, but what am I?
• You might be on a diet but you can still look at the menu
• Why mirrors reverse left and right, but not up and down
• I may not have had enough of me but I've had enough of you
• Opposites may attract, but is it a good idea?
• You need a license to have a dog, but any idiot can have a child
• A little Clint Black never killed anybody, but it did evacuate the building.
• I Kissed "Weird Al" Yankovic and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt
• butt rot
• Love is but a Fleeing Spec of Emotion
• The nothin' but coal for you, geek e2 westside holiday gathering and lan party
• Talking like a pirate is fun but annoys people
• Snowy reception on some channels but not on others
• How to develop one side of your butt and still have the other one flabby
• The good guys and the bad guys were on the back of the boat and I swear I only turned my back for a MINUTE but when I came back, they'd killed Mozart.
• Keep doing it, but don't call it that
• I feel like shit today, but I can always feel worse tomorrow
• But, my dear sir, if you educate them, they will no longer be Baptists
• My Mother and I Love Your Butt
• You know to me she's but a fetish
• you can't change the world, but you can change the facts
• What do girls think about guys when they catch guys staring at their breasts, but the guy is actually trying to read her shirt?
• If you can't help it, fuck it!
• You may be a noder, but you ain't no dancer

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