Here's the stuff we found when you searched for "I love you and want to save you from a horrible death at the hands of those damned, dirty apes"

• Damn Dirty Apes
• Simple methods for conversing with those suffering from death
• Never rely on an Artificial Intelligence to save you from fiery death
• I've always wanted to hear Morrissey sing the theme song from "The Love Boat"
• Happy those who with a glowing faith in one embrace clasped Death and Victory
• oh, Johnny Johnny Johnny, I want that kind of love
• To America with Love: Letters From The Underground
• What I want from life
• We should all know what it is to hold death in our hands.
• A Tornado South of Galveston from the Perspective of a Wet and Folded Love Letter
• You're here to save the world. Unfortunately, you live in a virtual world, detached from reality.
• From Sidon to Tyre, or Death Surprised
• Those pajamas just make me want to give you a great big full bodied bear hug flying tackle of cuddle doom
• Overgrowth (for those who have loved the emotionally disturbed)
• looking back from the moment of death, spiralling antimatter from the eyes
• Love And Death
• From the Orient, with love
• Don't give me your hand me down love
• The poems flow from the hand unbidden brand the hidden source is the watchful heart.
• A love poem scrawled from one stranger to another
• The Death of St. Narcissus (Or, A Love Song for St. Sebastian): Part II
• His love was enormous; it cleared rooms that desperately wanted to be full.
• Owen Juan Roberts: Letter From Death Row
• We are trapped in the belly of this horrible machine, and the machine is bleeding to death
• Making a flame appear from your hand
• From my cold dead hands
• Stop the Planet of the Apes, I Want to Get Off!
• An internet big enough to give you everything you want to read is an internet big enough to take from you everything you want to read
• He learned to dance from emus but he learned to love from seraphim
• Love poems from ancient Egypt
• Closer (I want to love you like a pikachu)
• I want to reach my hand into the dark and feel what reaches back
• Of course they want to come here. Who doesn't? Besides the people from Los Angeles, but we don't speak of them.
• Love, as seen from the inside of my head
• Love and Death on Long Island
• For Those I Love
• Are those the faces of love, those pale irretrievables?
• I once clutched death in my hands
• Through Death to Love
• Excerpt from "DEATH IN HYDERABAD"
• The Death of St. Narcissus (Or, A Love Song for St. Sebastian)
• A diversion from death's protocol
• People without dirty hands are wrong.
• sometimes death comes when it's the furthest thing from your mind
• Getting what you want from disgruntled lab techs
• A Letter from the Powers of the Universe Concerning Love and Other Such Things
• Saving Quicktime movies from a web page
• I want to be a dirty old man when I grow up
• Letter From My Father After the Death of My Mother
• A government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have
• The day we were married the leftover doves from his days of being a magician hummed little love songs in the attic
• She saved me from Hylas' fate
• God save me from the gift of prophecy
• From the shower, I nearly saved the world
• I want to put my hands there too
• I would love to hold your hand.
• love, dripping from the hilt of a dagger
• all I want to be is holding your hand
• I want to fall in love
• I love you, I want you, but you are a cruel monster
• The words were ways of touching and made us want to speak with hands
• Beings from space: What could they want?
• From Russia with Love
• Is the fact of your certain death enough to prevent you from enjoying life?
• I Do Not Want To Be One Of Those People
• Escape from the Planet of the Apes
• Wanted: Arch-Villain for Spider-Man. Those not dressed in green and purple need not apply.
• Effort on behalf of those we love is not work, but prayer disguised
• He loved her so much, he wanted to do her autopsy
• You, standing
• What is real but compassion as we move from birth to death
• Who shall deliver me from the body of this death?
• How to get SMS death threats from coke dealers in London
• Death From Above
• death save
• Who needs love when you can have death?
• Death From Above 1979
• From Death to Passwords Where You're a Paper Aeroplane
• Love The Sky To Death
• The winter chill reminds those of us closer to our end than our beginning that maybe, just maybe, safety isn't the primary goal in a life that will certainly end in death.
• From five to death and back
• Live from Death Row
• the death of true love
• It's always for those damn children
• sometimes death comes when it's the furthest from your mind
• Dirty Hands
• Dirty Love
• Describing love in dirty pictures
• My personal waking nightmare of 12 and 13: the horrible death of a marriage
• Things you don't want to hear from your bank
• Shows from which I save the stubs
• Getting Saved From the Sixties
• I used to love women from afar. Of course, now they call it stalking.
• How to disable menu fade-in in Windows 2000
• Someday soon, I'm going to save you from your life
• Getting what you want from tech support
• How to save your car from a porcupine
• From Death, Lead Me To Immortality
• Yeah I can love my fellow man; but I'm damned if I'll love yours.
• What it feels like to eject from a jet fighter
• Love poem from the monsters under my bed
• Save us from the horror of dull dead trees: a marathon E2 Quest
• Staying power like no other memory, aside from love
• Love forsakes us from time to time, and we forsake love.
• Who wants a Yo! MTV Raps Trading Card from the FUNKY FRESH holliman?
• Legislation to save us from our own stupidity
• Twinkle, twinkle, like a star. Does love flourish from afar?
• Balloons whose strings have slipped from unclutched hands
• And love keeps pouring into Toronto from everywhere it's despised
• all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
• “I want to make the milk,” or, More Tales from Youth
• Don't take any guff from those swine
• As long as it falls directly from your hand to mine I don't really care what it is
• love is such a more sustainable energy to draw from than hate
• Love Leave to urge, thou knowest thou hast the hand
• I want your hands on me
• Where the heck did those Hobbits come from
• chapters marked by love notes from another man's wife
• We'd all be better off if shaking hands were making love, and children were found in the cabbage patch.
• "I love you" hand
• Love Saves the Day
• Why I didn't want to find his love letters in my copy of East of Eden
• You couldn't save me back then. I will save you now. Trust me, take my hand.
• Leroy loves to meet new people, especially hand puppets
• A love letter from someone who cannot say I Love You
• The revolution does not put dreams on trial. Nor does it save us from nightmares.
• Those Damn Bandits
• Please, for the love of everything that is holy on this Earth. I just want the cold back.
• You hold water for those you love
• Your words are delicious and enticing, and I would save them all like love letters
• those valiant men who saved New Orleans
• I'm tired of all this, I just wanted the damned E2 Poster (document)
• Love letters to those along the way
• I want to write love letters to all of my friends
• Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy
• Faust: Love of the Damned
• Tarzan of the Apes
• Planet of the Apes
• ape drape
• Ape shit
• Beneath The Planet Of The Apes
• Yard Ape
• Thoughts on Early American Romantics and Planet of the Apes
• Monkeys, Apes and Sub-men
• Great Apes
• Aquatic Ape Theory
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 14
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 15
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 16
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 17
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 19
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 20
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 21
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 22
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 23
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 24
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 25
• Tarzan of the Apes Chapter 26
• worth a damn
• damn
• God damned sons of bitches
• damned
• The Damned
• Damn, I'm good.
• Damn Yankees
• I miss you, damn you for being so damn amazing
• Lies, damn lies, and statistics
• Damning with faint praise
• God Damn it!
• Damn skippy
• Damned if you do, damned if you don't
• Damn the man
• Damn it, I'm a Satan Worshipper
• Give Me the Damn Ball
• No matter what I did to fix it, the damn thing never got everything right
• Damn it feels good to be a nurturing male
• Don't settle for no damn coupon which they'll try to pass off to you
• Just give him the damned fish

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