I still wear the bracelet you made me

I still wear the bracelet you made me.

Even though it's over, you still mean a lot to me, and I still love you. Maybe it's not in the disgusting romantic way, and maybe it hasn't been that way for over a month. You are the first girl who has shown me how wonderful life can be if you take the time to spend it with someone you care about.

Spanish class is going to be different now, and seeing you will hurt. Too bad many of our friends are mutual, because I know I can't hang out with you, at least not now because I'll fall in love again.

These blue, black, and glow in the dark plastic beads have become assimilated into my wrist. I will feel naked without them.

They are pretty, they remind me of you, they remind me of myself.

They remind me of the good times.

I don’t think I could untie it if I wanted to.

Time and
everything I’ve spilled on it
have slowly fused the fibers
til they’re one.

So many colors, now one.

Our story got mixed up somehow
just like the pieces of this bracelet.
They’re all tied up as one.

One.

Which one of us was married
And which one lived a spinster?
How much of this was purple,
how much green?

(My story makes no sense
without yours next to it.)

I still wear the bracelet
that you made me
on a quiet afternoon
Back when we had time for the sun,
and when your hair was blond
and I was dressed in Autumn.

I still wear the bracelet that you made me --
It smells like peaches
and like me
(I’ve been wearing it so long)
But somehow it still feels like
you
and all the ways I cannot put away
the memories of you
(worn through
just like this bracelet).

You little plastic curse.
You sulking, suffering muse.
Wrapped tight 'round my wrist
And at this, my memory.

What do you want from me?
To remind me of her?
Why should I remember?
Why should I listen to you, bauble?

Are your beads a message?
Am I to think of her now?
Each shining moment brightened in turn,
Each instant immortal along your strand.

Should I dwell on her touch?
Sit here idle, remembering?
Think of how her smile caught me?
Endure this torture voluntarily?

...

Message received, little beads.
I miss her too,
But she'll be back soon enough

To take you away from me.