Findings:
- Collision avoidance technique
- Get dressed NOW or you're going in your underwear.
- If you can't spell, you're an idiot. "Original ideas" don't come from idiots.
- 25 ways not to tell someone that you're in love with them
- Beautiful words are nonsense if you can't hear how you're saying them.
- "Of course humans aren't intelligent. They don't even have glurbleflukers. If you can't glurblefluke, you're not sentient."
- I can't decide if what you're saying is too profound for me to comprehend or just insane
- What they don't know can't hurt them
- I know you're up there. I am but a discontented symbol birthed from the blood of your terrible pen.
- Where the hell do you think you're going today?
- You're not going to be happy until you put someone's eye out
- If you can't be used, you're useless.
- How to tell if you're addicted to hunting
- If you're going to speak archaic English, use it correctly!
- If you don't know where you're going, any path will take you there
- If you're going to masturbate, would you at least close the fucking door?
- You Can't Build a Mental Picture of Someone You're in Love With
- She's waiting to tell you if you're ready to know.
- They can see that you're missing something inside
- You know you're from Prince Edward Island if...
- Does it keep you company or remind you you're alone?
- Of course they want to come here. Who doesn't? Besides the people from Los Angeles, but we don't speak of them.
- How to treat the dog you're going to kill
- You're going home in the back of an ambulance
- Knowing you're going to die when you turn 30
- You're voting this sucka down now, but I'm going to laugh
- What's the point of having doors if you're just going to give away keys?
- Eat like every meal's a banquet. Drink like every flagon's your last. Fuck like you're going into battle
- How to tell you're not making it in showbiz
- People tell us who they are, but we ignore it, because we want them to be who we want them to be.
- They say you're a man with true grit.
- You're not from around here, are you?
- You're either a patriot or a terrorist
- Put That Thing Back Where it Came From or So Help Me
- Stand back from the doors or they might kill you
- You're here to save the world. Unfortunately, you live in a virtual world, detached from reality.
- From Death to Passwords Where You're a Paper Aeroplane
- you can only make me dizzy if you're spinning me in leaves or snowflakes
- Live so that they cry when you're born and laugh when you die
- Everything is hazy and perfect when you're on enough hard drugs to disconnect you from reality.
- If you're going to America, bring your own food
- If you're going to do something evil, do it on April Fools' Day
- If you're going to complain about store policy, don't do it to the employees!
- If you're going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair
- The torn fragments of the world slowly stitch themselves together again, and in the rubble you hear them say: Why Are You Here?
- Don't kill your invisible husband to see what he looks like or you'll sob your heart out. But don't worry about the millions of invisible men coming to attack your village because they won't kill you if you don't know how to fight them.
- We must remember them or they cease to be.
- when you're done, you can let her die if that's what you want. Or you can wake her.
- you can lower your standards, or your pants, but you can't make them love you
- How to tell if you're having a heart attack
- If you're not in the picture you can't get framed.
- You're either with us or you're against us
- remember, when they look right through you, you're still there
- if you're lucky, they fuse into something bright and astonishing
- If you're not sure whether or not you've been had, then you've already been had.
- Music that is either by the Sonic Youth or by some band that is ripping off the Sonic Youth, but you can't tell which
- i can't tell car accidents from car on-purposes
- I won't take your protests seriously unless you're naked or on fire.
- Your radical ideas about taking candy from thefez have already occurred to others
- You're never far from the sound of an engine
- The hot girls from cold countries have scars you're not supposed to see
- You can't rant when you're not angry
- You can tell a lot about a person from their e-mail address
- Violins can't help it
- Help! I'm noding and I can't get up!
- A thousand years from now, we should have coffee and tell stories while the world disintegrates
- Who is protecting whom from what?
- steal out the eyes from the angels and set them as stars
- A word from anyone's alien
- Things you can't tell just by looking at her
- I'm from the government, and I'm here to help you.
- Being a dickhead
- They Flee From Me
- I can't tell you my username because I know you too well
- Crawling through festering flesh, hungry and, yearning, they wait for the day they will tear away from the dark.
- But I'm a good person! Yeah great you wanna help me with this or what?
- God helps those who help themselves
- One of the dangers of necromancy is you don't really know who's on the other side or what they're going to give you in return.
- born under candlelight just from the edge of a knife, was it a life? or was it a light at all?
- Memories aren't only in your head if you can't walk down a road without having them.
- buildings so tall you can't even see the tops of them
- not running from, but going to
- Where do dogs get their Vitamin C from, when they don't eat fruits?
- if you are going to steal from me, at least steal something of value
- We're acting happy to stop ourselves from going insane.
- Economic and Social Divisions in late 19th-century America
- With a Little Help from My Friends
- I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence, or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me
- I can't think of anyone who could appreciate more than me your eyes and your voice
- A lot of houses don't even have anyone to board them up.
- Made direct amends to such people wherever possible except when to do so would injure them or others
- Help me tell you a story about things and yourself, without pants
- In the Fifties, a visitor from Great Britain to New York City notices a young Black woman driving a limousine. A portly middle-aged man, race undetermined, is in the back. Tell her story.
- If you don't love yourself, you can't love anyone else.
- Lord I Just Can't Keep from Crying
- you can't escape from God on a Sunday
- It looks like you're writing an anarchist manifesto…
- I'm beginning to think that nothing I think or say makes sense to anyone but me
- Anyone who tells you there is only one correct way to write a novel is trying to sell you a book.
- some people touch it, but they can't hold on
- You can’t see it like that. It’s never been anyone’s responsibility to do what’s impossible. It’s not yours.
- If you can't tell, does it matter?
- I think this hurts. I can't tell.
- From now on, any ordinary knowledge is no longer going to satisfy you, I'm afraid
- How They Brought the Good News from Ghent to Aix
- You can't get there from here
- How to tell if a guy is circumcised from across the bar
- Not from the head
- You can learn a lot about someone from the way they die
- from where I stand I can see they have already won
- Protecting your home from the Germans
- Take a day, plant some trees, may they shade you from me
- Years from now I can tell the story of it
- try to memorize this moment so that years from now I can tell the story of it
- It is only in marriage with the world that our ideals can bear fruit: divorced from it, they remain barren.
- To withhold forgiveness from a person is like drinking poison and waiting for them to die.
- How is poetic form going to help me scream about revolution
- I'm going to take five of those six exclamation points and drive them into the soft flesh under your fingernails
- Help! I'm going to have sex
- If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you
- John's Cool Story: Tough Luck, or The Vurping from Room 2306
- The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
- Somewhere there is a syphilitic prostitute who is going to tell me about India
- If they're going up to the sun, the stars and the moon, why don't they bring the moon down for us?
- I'm not going to simplify things just so they can fit inside your mind. You don't deserve that.
- Everything Quest: You kids stop your fighting or I will turn this car around so help me God
- I just submit to one or two days of horror for going out and playing at being a normal functioning person
- And if I don't die or worse I'm going to need a nap
- Beings from space: What could they want?
- Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke
- The "He can't tell the difference" beer commercial
- People can get stuff here that they can't get anywhere else.
- Pirates and ninjas: why they should be friends but can't be
- i remember reading this but i can't remember if i liked it or not
- You can't tell sleep where to go
- Cemeteries are boring, but I can't seem to stay away from this one in particular.
- Can't tell if being trolled
- I can't even begin to tell you how I feel about certain things for reasons that you may find difficult to understand
- Why I am going to pretend I am a girl online from now on
- Are you such a fucking loser you can't tell when you've won?
- Can't you tell we're barrelling toward an alien future?
- Things we say and do when we can't tell the truth
- Telling real pearls from fake ones
- And the power of the Great Peace drove the evil from them
- Now your songs mean what they were supposed to from the beginning
- I used to love women from afar. Of course, now they call it stalking.
- Someday soon, I'm going to save you from your life
- how to tell a brachiopod shell from a bivalve mollusk shell
- These people from the other village smell wrong! Kill them!
- Keeping secrets from your children may harm them
- Protecting your home from bushfire
- From Sidon to Tyre, or Death Surprised
- Which God was cooler, the one from the Old Testament or the one from the New Testament?
- Deep Fried Foods in the Restaurant
- scattering, like flower petals or crowds from the sound of a gunshot
- An American in Tours
- “I want to make the milk,” or, More Tales from Youth
- if I can't be with you, then I'll write about you, or I'll write about something else
- Men can download naked women. Women can't download men worshipping them. Ha ha!
- Words you can't use unless they describe you
- Usually, if you've seen one bald man in a robe, you've seen 'em all, but most of them aren't burning alive from the inside out
- Are apples, or a woman, so far from your reality?
- The starfish sends a message in code that you can't see from the lighthouse
- If You Can't Change the Roll - We Can't Help You.
- Lessons learned from the rap industry may or may not serve a useful purpose in everyday life
- Listen to me, because I am in the soapbox. This is the voice of the soapbox. I am calling to you. Do you hear the sounds of my soaply siren song? My syntactically sweet strumming along to sequential sequestrations of symmetrically snakey st
- the flecks of smoke and sparks don't conjure you back from the ground or heaven
- They devour the frayed edges of the world, and all we hear is chitinous clicking from the darkness
- If you can't help it, fuck it!
- don't start from words. they are a nest of lies.
- may you make mistakes large enough to learn from, but small enough that they do not destroy you
- She is lobbing rainbows at me from across the room and I am swallowing them like fear.
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