Fictitious syndicated columnist in the the
satirical newspaper, "
The Onion".
Jean Teasdale is an overweight, white trash woman in her late thirties who has a part time job at the Fashion Bug and is married to Hubby Rick, who stays out late drinking beer and never shows any appreciation for his wife.
Jean's articles are so funny because she is obviously sexually and emotionally unfulfilled, but she covers up her feelings with cute material possessions such as Precious Moments figurines and Beanie Babies. Her articles discuss her being arrested, breaking out into tears, being fired, losing her pet kitty (he choked on a Pinchers the Lobster Beanie Baby),
and several other depressing adventures. Regardless, she always casts anything unhappy aside with her false cheerfulness, trivializing her feelings with exclamation points and cliché sayings ("Keep smiling", for example.)
We all know someone like Jean Teasdale, but you have to feel sorry for her because nobody really cares. Her articles are great, though. Check out the archives at www.theonion.com.