Johnny Bravo was the short-lived Rock God persona
of The Brady Bunch
's Greg Brady
. In a fifth season episode called "Adios, Johnny Bravo", the irrepressible
Brady kids, emboldened by their third place win in the Pete Sterne Amateur Hour
, try out their musical act for another such amateur
musical competition. Holy fuck can you believe they lose this one too? But in the audience, watching intently Greg Brady and his uniquely dimensioned torso
, is musical agent Tami Cutler.
Cutler wants to sign Greg. Greg at first assumes she wants to sign the entire bunch. But no, she just wants Greg. She keeps mysterious, subtly trying to measure the width of his shoulders and the circumference of his chest. He's to be the new teen singing sensation
"Johnny Bravo" and would he mind too much not only cutting his siblings (half of whom aren't even blood relations) out of fame and fortune but would he mind terribly wearing this totally faggy matador jacket
? Just put on the suit. Come on. Just put it on.
Greg manages to over come several moral dilemmas, including cutting his siblings (half of whom aren't even blood relations) out of fame and fortune, being a corporate rock whore
, and worst of all not attending college
The one ethical dilemma Greg can't over come, however, is he notices none of his singing is actually used on the final product. He's on the album cover, in that totally faggy matador
jacket, but his voice has been dubbed by someone who sounds a lot like the guy who dubbed over Mel Gibson
in the American release of Mad Max
What the fuck?
Greg does a little digging and discovers Tami Cutler did not want him because of his actual singing talent. As it turns out, he fit the suit
. Greg was the only one who could fit into Johnny Bravo's expensive, faggy matador jacket. If she wanted someone in a smart looking Spanish jacket, could not the bitch have waited for Bo Derek
's singing career to have taken flight? Did she have to divide House Brady? The music industry is nothing but a heartless all consuming maw
that eats up earnest, eager nineteen-year olds and then spits out their marrow
-free bones. It's yet another argument why MP3
trading is ethical.
Greg gives Tami the kiss off saying "Adios, Johnny Bravo."
If any lessons were learned from Sean Connery
beyond you should never go on TV and claim women sometimes need to be hit, you should simply never say never
. Barry Williams
, the actor who portrayed Greg Brady, reprised his role as Johnny Bravo some thirty years later. In time with the 30th anniversary of The Brady Bunch
, in the fall of 1999 Williams released a Golden Throats
-esque CD called "The Return of Johnny Bravo". The CD featured twelve songs. Most were covers you always dreamed of getting the Johnny Bravo treatment like Huey Lewis
's "Hip to Be Square
" and Queen
's "We are the Champions
". But for those clamoring for the consummate
Barry Williams as the consummate Johnny Bravo, the CD tossed Bravo fans an original tune called "Johnny's Back".
The phrase and concept behind "he fit the suit
" entered the popular lexicon
to explain why some people are in jobs despite a lack of talent or qualifications. "Why did Bill get promoted to Product Manager
? He can't manage dick." "He fit the suit, I guess."
Another line from "Adios, Johnny Bravo" was inspiration for John Lydon
's Sex Pistol stage name of Johnny Rotten
. Greg, waxing philosophically about the fleeting and sometimes unreal nature of fame, states:
I thought I could change my name and my personality and become some big flashy rock star, but I was just kidding myself. Let's face it, Johnny Bravo's nothing but Johnny Rotten.