Start Again


Put one foot in front of the other. Watch as you try to separate one element from the other. Everything ties together in a way. The rational, logical creatures who put all their faith in science will talk to you of coincidence. They'll chat you up about cause and effect and all those terms they have conjured up to explain what no one can explain. They will never understand your life's mythology or your personal reality. They see only one truth. The dogma of science is no better than the dogma of the "one true faith."

If everyone is right, as I believe, then everyone who supposes to impose their truth upon others is wrong. We talk. We communicate. We are not fit to dictate. We are barely able to comprehend and understand. There are those who will pretend, for they have convinced themselves of a universal truth about things, and it fits their personal reality very comfortably.

Never lose faith in yourself
Everything else is window dressing
Believe in yourself
Grow and prosper
Give everything you can to everyone you know
And yes, love
Love is everything

You will know yourself when you surrender the need to convince others to think and act in a way you are familiar with or can control. People are people. You are people. I am people. All I do is turn my salt shaker upside down and spread salt across the table. I'll never grab you by the neck and make you taste it. Fly your own flag. Sail your own sea. I am captain of nothing and I prefer it that way.

I have known mentors in my life. It took me a while to listen to them, but eventually I did listen. They had come so far and they had lessons to teach. They listened as well as they spoke. It is the nature of the mentor to process, understand and then speak. The better mentors do it in a subtle fashion. The best mentors are subtle without you realizing how subtle they really are. They give you something you won't dig out of your consciousness for years. They are the masters. It doesn't matter what they really accomplished in their own life. Failure teaches far more than success. Look to the failed for guidance. The meek shall inherit the earth.

Don't be afraid to find yourself
Again, and again and again
This frame affords you limited time
There will be other frames
I know this but don't expect you to believe me
I have no expectations

It all comes back to you in memories. Somehow we connect one set of dots to another set of dots. My father once spoke of life as a collection of moments. He said that we pass the time between moments by doing the same mundane tasks and following the same routines. He did not realize that there is always a fluctuation in the routine. There is always a change in the mundane. It is often so small, so insignificant seeming that we fail to pay attention. Everything is always changing. The breeze from the north is not the same as the breeze from the west, but how often are we paying attention to which direction the breeze comes from? When the summer heat is bearing down, any breeze is welcome.

Time for a cool change.

I knew a man once who was very rational and logical. He said that when it came to love, there was no reason why the parts could not be interchangeable. Someone with similar features and common interests and focuses could easily be substituted for someone with whom a relationship had failed. Fill in the blanks. Find what is missing and substitute. That man was me. When they said repent, I did not know what they meant.

Once upon a time I gave up on someone I loved because I felt she could be easily replaced. There was no reason why she could be more special than someone similar who might cross my path. I spent a decade trying to color in the pictures in her coloring book with the crayons of another. When it didn't work I lost faith in myself. I lost faith in everything. I didn't want to live any longer. The very thought that one person could not be replaced drove me mad. People are supposed to be people. You can find them anywhere.

"I need to say something
and then I need to leave."

You've waited your whole life for this moment. The thing is, you don't realize you've waited your whole life for it until the moment is upon you. Then it is so heavy that you can't bring yourself to focus. You've held this inside you for so long and now you are busting at the seams. You wonder if it will matter. You wonder if it will make a difference. Are you thinking about cause and effect or are you thinking of every peripheral effect this will have on your very existence?

We fail to realize that everything matters, and even when we do realize, we try too hard to turn everything in the right direction. Let the river flow. Things are going to happen that you cannot control. People are their own independent universes and while we may inspire and influence them, we cannot control them. Be who you are. Express yourself. Say the words. Release fear, for it is what enslaves us. The demon manifests itself as fear. We are not truly free until we release the fear. You may not get what you desire and hope for, but once you have opened yourself and allowed what is inside to be spoken, you have won another battle against fear.

It all connects somehow
We don't have a map
But we can trace back to where we've been
And see how we arrived at where we are

You can always settle for being average. The average person accepts everything he is given and never reaches for anything more. The average person follows the trends and the interests of others and tries to fit in the best he can. He does not aspire. He forgets who he is in the interest of becoming the person everyone else wants him to be. He lives in the box. They built this box for average people. Did you really want to end up being average?

The times they are a changing. As you connect the dots you realize how important it was to keep the book of memories. These things played out for a reason. You are being prepared for the shift. There is a shift. You are riding the wave. You need to be able to anticipate how it breaks. This collection of moments is tied together by the time that passes in between. Forget nothing. Be everything. Wake yourself up. You might need more coffee.

I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go
Walkin' with a dead man over my shoulder
Don't run away
It's only me


Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.