Despite real life becoming more and more peculiar every day, stories such as this are hard to come by. However, not even a David Chase, David Lynch or much less a Steven Spielberg could have invoked the apex of their creative powers and come out with this result. Keyontyli and Taleon Goffney, 25, were arrested February 19th by officers from a multi-state task force who claimed the two broke into a Philadelphia beauty parlor by cutting through the building's roof. The twin brothers are being investigated in a spree of burglaries in Pennsylvania, Delaware and New Jersey. Mind you, stories of burglaries are a dime a dozen. The story gets an extra plus from the fact that the alleged perpetrators gain entry by boldly going through the roof, a technique evoking a James Bond move. And it's also an interesting twist that the alleged perpetrators happen to be very attractive, well-muscled identical twins of African-American and Thai heritage.

Well, what makes this story deserving of a gold star is the fact that beside gaining entry to buildings, these boys have, er, gained entry (with consent) to the nether-quarters of various gleeful participants, including each other. Philadelphia's Channel 3, a CBS television network affiliate, reported that their cameras caught the pair being led away to police vehicles, but that it wasn't a big deal, because they've gotten quite used to being in front of a camera in compromising positions. Must you make me say it out loud? These boys are porn stars. Holy instance of incest, Batman!
 

As To Career Choices, A Boy Could Do Worse

Yes, these young men have appeared on DVDs engaging in fellatio, anal sex and various and sundry cuddlings, etc. with each other and with other porn stars. This claim has been verified by one Erik Schut of TLA Entertainment Group in Philadelphia, an online vendor of gay porn videos. Schut pointed out that they could've had quite the career. The Associated Press quotes Schut as saying "They are incredibly good-looking, and being identical twins, it's a novelty." The brothers have also appeared in videos and video trailers on websites such as Blackmen.net and EbonyD.com using the names "Teyon" and "Keyon"

Keyontyli has been in the business of pleasure since prior to 2002, while his brother got involved only much more recently. You see, his brother had been busy acquiring quite a rap sheet committing burglaries, larcenies, and drug-related offenses in the three above-mentioned states as well as Alabama and Florida. Together, law enforcement officials believe, they've committed up to 40 robberies in the tri-state area where the task force was set up.

Keyontyli's modeling web site states that he's appeared in films and on the television network programs Saturday Night Live and, in a twist of irony, Law & Order. Sources for this piece do not indicate what, if any, career Taleon has pursued in the past. We do know, however, that Taleon has interesting, avant-garde taste in fashion. A Camden, New Jersey bulletin from the Prosecutor's office states that he was "Last seen wearing a dark-colored tank top, tan cargo shorts, no shoes and handcuffs." You'd think his brother the model could spare at least a single pair of Gucci loafers for the unshod escapee.
 

Limber?

Taleon is, however a trained gymnast and karate expert, who in the past has used his athletic prowess (stop that! I said "athletic" prowess) to make several pretty wild escapes from police. The one which takes the cake is the case of Taleon's breaking the glass out of the window of a moving police cruiser, while handcuffed, and jumping into a lake, still handcuffed. He swam across the lake taunting officers that they'd never catch him. He turned himself in a week later. A year ago, Taleon jumped 30 feet from the roof of a New Jersey liquor store and swam across a river in the dead of winter before he was caught.

New Jersey officers doing a surveillance for drug activity saw Taleon walk up walls and do back-flips. The officers agreed they were glad that he was not the target of their surveillance. An hour later, he was caught making hand-to-hand drug sales in the same area. Suffice it to say, backup was called before Taleon was apprehended. Beside the drugs, he was found with a handgun in his pocket, (and no, he was not glad to see the men in uniform) possession of which is a no-no for a convicted felon in any state.

Further proof of "Tayon's" physical prowess can be found in living color on the streaming-video website Blackmen.net, where Tayon can be seen in all his glory going where no man has gone before. According to the site, Tayon is the first to "top" famed porn star Marc Williams. For those who need further explanation, think of a famous baseball pitcher turning around and for once in his life playing the position of catcher.
 

Reaction of the Gay Community

This just goes to prove that gay people can be found in all walks of life, explains the Publisher of the Philadelphia Gay News, Mark Segal. "Gay people are in every single aspect of life, it's something we have always said. While they may not be people who are burglars, there are also fire and police people who are also gay."

"Keyon made his start into porn with us back in 2002," says Phillip Bleicher at Flavaworks (a gay porn website). "He was one of the sweetest models we had ever worked with. We last saw him at New York City Pride in June 2007 and he again was friendly and caring. It's too sad."

One would hazard a guess that given the preponderance of evidence against them they will be relegated to either a New Jersey or Federal penitentiary. This dynamic duo of crime — and believe me, they'd make a visually striking dynamic duo from their exotic eyes, perfect white teeth, past their well-built pectorals and down to their six-pack abs (as you can see, I hardly noticed) — will have to find something to do other than their existing profession. Although there are classes for ESL and GED in most, if not all correctional institutions, Art Film is, of this writing, not one of the course offerings. But then, with all of those testosterone-filled, lonely, big, men in there, perhaps they could get some quality rehearsal time in...
 

SOURCES

"The Strange Case of Gay Porn Twins Teyon and Keyon," by Ann Turner, GayWired.com, February 28, 2008 http://www.gaywired.com/NewsArticle.cfm?Section=67&id=18331&CFID=19289294&CFTOKEN=83634405 (Accessed March 2, 2008)

Camden County (New Jersey) Prosecutor's Office Wanted Person Information for Media http://www.camdencounty.com/government/offices/prosecutor/mr2006/0505a2006.html (Accessed March 2, 2008)

Keyontyli Goffney Modeling Site http://www.adxtend.com/keyon/index (Accessed March 2, 2008)

"Twin Brother Bandits Doubled as Gay Porn Stars" Website of CBS3 in Philadelphia, February 27, 2008 http://cbs3.com/local/Robbery.Twins.Taleon.2.658587.html (Accessed March 2, 2008)

Keyontyli Goffney at Jurgita Magazine http://www.jurgita.com/models-id95989.html (Accessed March 2, 2008)

"Twin Brothers Charged in Daring Philadelphia Crime Spree" The Daily Voice Beta - "Black America's Daily News Source" http://thedailyvoice.com/voice/2008/02/twin-gay-porn-stars-charged-in-000252.php (Accessed March 2, 2008)

"Gay Porn Stars Suspected in Tri-State Robbery Spree" Rod2:beta http://rodonline.typepad.com/ (Accessed March 2, 2008)

"Twin Gay Porn Actors Charged in Burglary" The Advocate.com http://www.advocate.com/news_detail_ektid52436.asp (Accessed March 2, 2008)

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