Tell me lies. A Quest for April.


"Tell me sweet little lies"
Fleetwood Mac


After the (moderate) success of the previous Lie Quest, and because Jay Bonci and Jet-Poop were so insistent and have good blackmail material, I decided to have another stab at running it, despite my being in Reno for most of the month. A short visit from my ninja otters persuaded Tem42 to include it in the rotation. I am going to threaten some god to give out prizes. It all kicks off on April Fool's Day, but we're making it Fool's Month.

In any case, make shit up. I'm thinking tall tales. I'm thinking modren¹ mythos. I'm thinking the whackiest stories from your tortured minds. I'm thinking the biggest and baddest lie you can tell, no matter how outrageous. Alternatively, tell us stories of great lies, and lies about lies if you must. in the vein of Jet-Poop's Pope Gregory VIII you could even write about a real something or someone you now little of, but without doing any research whatsoever.


  1. This Quest will run from 00:00 server time on 1 April, 2022 until 23:59 on 31 April 2022.
  2. Writeups must be clearly and openly hard-linked to this node. No sneaky, crafty pipelinks.
  3. Only writeups posted within the times allotted will be accepted.
  4. Message me once you have posted your writeup.
  5. Each writeup accepted will gain a small reward of 33GP.
  6. Each C! on accepted writeups will receive a bonus of 11GP.
  7. There may or may not be an overall winner. But I'm betting there will be.
  8. The judges' opinions are final and subject to the usual bribes *cough*beer*cough*.


The judges for this Quest are: andycyca, Jet-Poop and John Thomas Cholmondeley-Minge. The judging panel will, after the Quest has ended, select the best of all accepted writeups, and suitable rewards will be forthcoming. The remainder will be burned with fire as being vastly inferior.

N.B. There is a fine line between fiction and such tales. This is not a "fiction" quest. There is a big difference. These are stories told as though they are real. Think Hinzelman from American Gods, think Paul Bunyan stories. Even better, peek at the entrants for LieQuest 2013.

Entries (also linked into the LieQuest 2022 category)

Near-misses and honourable mentions

Rewards and prizes

6 May, 2022
Tem42 has been alerted to do participation rewards, prize judging has commenced and may take a wee while. Rancid_Pickle 385, JD 132, wertperch 253, losthuskie 110, Hazelnut 77, andycyca 165, etouffee 44, Jet-Poop 165, Zephronias 77, Bookreader 65, mauler 77

After much thought and a few spreadsheets, consulting andycyca, Jet-Poop, the bones and just making shit up, I decided the winners are:

  1. Hazelnut
  2. JD
  3. Rancid_Pickle

I'm giving a special prize to Jet-Poop for starting Nick Ayala, and mauler for that genius meta cleverness in the same node. Also andycyca because that Nodermeet one had me laughing so hard.




¹ It's a perfectly cromulent word. (Also, damn you, Rancid Pickle! You beat me to the draw.)

Have you ever wondered what happens in a judge's brain in order to judge Quest entries? Wonder no more, the answer lies beneath:

Andy's Opinion on LieQuest 2022 entries

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