Motivations at the gym

There seems to be a glaring difference between men and women at the gym. Most of the men stare confidently
at themselves in the mirrors as they curl free weights. The women, however, get this glazed look on their
faces while on the stairmaster. It too, is a look of determination, but of a different kind. Flipping through
page after page of anorexic models and diets that make an Ethopian’s meal look like the dessert table at Dom
Deluise's wedding, their eyes seem to say, “Someday, Some guy will love me. If I could just lose 20
pounds.”

Lately I've been going to the gym before work in the morning in an attempt to get in better shape. Getting up in the morning was bad enough before, but now you want me to get up an hour earlier?

Sure, it's easier to just get up a "bit" earlier than try to work around carpool schedules, evening activities, and slacker friends who don't show up because they have had to work around schedules, etc.

But I Digress

Here are a few things to think about when your standing there in your gym strip trying to keep from falling asleep and wishing you could go home.

• The chicks'll dig me.
• Think that [Insert admired and muscled person you admire here] got like they are by being a lazy bastard? I don't think so!
• If I work my lazy ass maybe it won't be so big.
• Look around. Think that these people are wanting to go home? Didn't think so. Push harder.

• So many people do this excercise thing there must be something to it.
• I'll finally get mom to stop making those little comments about how I'm overweight.
• Those army guys don't look so tough, just a few more weeks and I'll be able to kick their asses.
• I'm looking just a tiny bit better than the other guys here, gotta keep working to keep ahead.
• GET YOUR ASS MOVING YOU LAZY WORM!
• Just a bit more and I won't feel so threatened by my friends' girlfriend's brother the bodybuilder.
• My SO is lying when she says I look good. Lying lying lying.
• How can I woo women and other hotties with that gut?
• I won't feel so bad about having the mocha with lots of whipped cream on top if I work hard.
• Feel guilty about the pizza I had last night.
• Feel guilty about the extra piece of pizza I had when I finished the last in the box last night.
• If I'm here already I may as well do something I guess.
• The cute girls here will notice if I slack off.
• Feel the burn! Feel the burn! ouch yes I feel the burn and it's fucking killing me