A lot of things have happened in the nation over the last few years.

Lot of things. Too many to cover here. But they must be discussed. In earnest. By people with intelligence, moral reasoning skills, and an easy use of hyperbole in a variety of contexts. Could you be one of these people?

Representative Racy Joel Carlton is my current employer (after people found out Susan Collins was still alive and kicking me out of my job as a United States Senator - which I held for three weeks while old Susie Q was off being fundamentally concerned about one thing or another). Anyway, Representative Carlton is still looking to hire more hoors for his businesses up and down the east coast. Call him at the Capitol switchboard. It is okay to let them know you are a hoor. No one cares about these things any longer. America is sinking.

But you can still get work as a hoor. Look into it. You look like a hoor. Honestly, it is the first thing I think about whenever I think about you. Honest. Ain't no word of a lie, babygirl. Hit me on the flip side, eh?

We've got this thing working now.

Representative Carlton is also looking to issue high-caliber automatic weapons to school children en masse after Christmas. He's be looking for some sturdy types to work on the project with him. I know noders have noodles for arms as a rule. I mean, you guys are a notoriously weak-ass bunch except for that guy who is sometimes in Afghanistan and that other guy who is always killing people in basements or having knife fights with chimps, but if you know anyone, let them know. Call Representative Carlton at the Capital switchboard. It is okay to talk loudly. No one is concerned about these types of things any longer. America is sinking. White men want more money.

Now, as your resident ray of sunshine, and the only anecdote for the North Korean propaganda that fills New Writeups day after day since the fall of the Old Gods, I'm pleased to say that things are looking up.

Have you ever gotten wet just knowing that this cute older guy is in love with you and you're getting off on driving him crazy?

I do.

What a way of life.

I finished a class I was teaching last night.

This is a class that is kind of hard to describe, as most of my work as a English as a Second Language teacher is. A few months ago, I went to a meeting at a local community center that is loosely affiliated with my local university to find out about volunteering to teach a class. And after I had signed up to teach a once-a-week, 1 hour class by zoom, I found out that there was a "stipend" attached. It was fairly generous, about equivalent on an hourly basis, to what I would get teaching at a community college or state university. But since this was only a hour a week for two months, not a tremendous amount of money.

The class had the typical problem with an ESL class in the Zoom era. Problems with links and connections. Problems with scheduling. A high attrition rate. Students with different ability and interest levels. After two months of weekly classes, we bid goodbye, with hopes that some type of class will begin again next year, after winter vacation. I like starting classes, I like having classes, but I also like concluding classes, so there was a healthy glow of accomplishment. At least, I assume there was, the dreary late November days and the worry about the world in general made it hard to discuss.

I am also trying to think of how I will phrase this on a resume. Was it teaching at the university level? This was an organization housed on the university campus, where students, the family of students, and general members of the community go to learn the English language and the local culture. Some of my students were university students. My class followed, in general form, what I would teach about English to non-native University students. So it was, in some ways, a university-level ESL class. But not without some explanations. But here is another thing, that reflects how bizarre it is get a job right now. In general, getting jobs at the university level takes a lot of work and luck. And bureaucracy. An application involves a resume, a philosophy/interest letter, references, and often answering additional questions on a form, that then wends its way through several steps of selection commitees, including the well-known Interdepartmental Group on Knowledge Leadership, leading to a series of interviews, and then beginning work in six months. As opposed to what I did here--- I went to a meeting, and without resume, interview, references, or any of the usual accouterments of the job seeking process, I had a professional job with professional pay. Even if it wasn't called a job, and wasn't called pay. When an organization or company really wants someone, it is surprising how quickly they can get someone.

Although, in the middle of the current inflation and labor crisis, I don't know if HR departments have gotten the memo. As far as I know, HR departments are still focusing on making sure forms don't have any red asterisk fields, and not on actually hiring people quickly.

I think I got further behind this year than any other. I'm not willing to take the time to check. I expected the end of the month to be a real noding for numbers mess of low quality write-ups where I'm kind of ashamed of my output but it somehow came together. It's not my best work but I feel like once I let go of the notion that every work needs to be at least five hundred words my prose actually improved. It's strange, I don't personally subscribe to the idea that effort equals quality but I find myself applying it to my stuff and then being surprised when I get chings in a seemingly random fashion. My most chinged write-up is Mandela Effect and I have no idea why. I'd put it in the lower half of my personal ranking for stuff I've written. The caprice of other people likes is one of the most interesting part of of this site for me.

IRON NODER XIV: THE RETURN OF THE IRON NODER

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.