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Not only have I have no classes, but neither does kanon, so ... what to do? Suggestions, questions, comments, concerns? /msg me or kanon42 with your ideas on how to spend our blissfully free-of-responsibility Friday.

(More when Friday actually happens.)

9:59pm Thursday: I think we've decided to go to the Liberty Science Center. Unfortunately, public transportation is a bitch (New Jersey Transit and PATH required), so we'll have to drive... yuck.

Long day.

I woke up at 5am, washed my hair, was done getting ready by six. Sat around for another hour, got some forgotten homework finished. Seems like I forget all my homework these days. Senioritis. Oops.

First hour was A.P. Art. We just worked on figure drawing, which is always fun. The kids posing for us were from the special education department, so they weren't too good at keeping still. But we weren't doing much detail, just sketching, so that wasn't a big deal.

A.P. Stats. Had a rather large and important test on chapter two. I was the second person finished, right after Thadeus Wilson. He's valedictorian of our class, and a varsity golf player. I asked him why there were no two irons. He laughed.

Left school at eleven and went home. Grandma was in the kitchen standing by the microwave, waiting for water to boil. I talked to Aaron a bit, and then went to my flute lesson with Pollee. We have auditions for chairs tomorrow, and I'm aiming for first in symphony band. I was only second last year, and pretty disapointed. The chick who was first was a real bitch to me, always pointing out every mistake and saying I was out of tune. I tried my best to ignore her though. She was schizophrenic.

Made it back to school in time for seventh hour. We never do anyhting worthwhile in that class, but I love the teacher. Mr. Knoll is the shit. He raps out directions and has a million catch phrases. He also approves of my writing style, which tends to lean towards the incredibly unbelievable to completely insane. I just can't write seriously in that class.

Went to Hope after school got out. I was supposed to have a meeting with the student teacher, Sandrine, but she never showed up. I left around ten after three and went home to take a nap.

My dad woke me up to say he needed me to drive grandma to Ruby Tuesdays so she could meet my mom there for dinner. I said I had to go to my NAHS meeting at seven and had to leave right then. He said "oh, that's fine," but in a way which made me feel like the scum of the earth for not doing such a simple favor. I wonder how parents manage to put such menaning behind such common words. But I really couldn't have taken her and made it to the meeting on time. I hope dad understood that.

And now I am home. I had some pizza rolls and some boston cream pie for dinner. My art teacher told me to eat more fat so I wouldn't complain about being cold so often. She's one to talk - Mrs. Propst is the size of half a toothpick. But I told her I would, so I did. Simple as that.

I would really love to go to bed, but that's not going to happen for quite a while yet. Gotta get my french homework done (chapitre deux - Un Papillon dans la Cité) for tomorrow. And I need to practice the audition piece. Mom and dad will be disappointed if I don't get first. Too many expectations from too many people. Sometimes I just want to scream "fuck it" at the top of my lungs, and do what makes me happy instead of what needs to be done in order to get into college and prepare for my future. Don't we ever get to live for the present?

I go through these days where everything is so silent in my mind, and the outside world is so loud by comparison that I get earaches so bad they cause me to cry. (this is made worse by the fact that due to something that happened to me a few years ago I now have an equilbrium problem that has to do with my ear. It's...confusing. And, not something I like to talk about.)

Today is one of those days.

This might have to do with the four hours of sleep I got last night. A friend of mine came into to town from about two hours away and we went out after I got off of work last night. She's incredible. She lived here up until two weeks ago. I miss her. Anyway, We saw a few local bands play downtown. The last one we heard was not a band, but a chick with a guitar. She was incredible. One of the songs she sang reminded me of a friend (Well, I think we're still friends. I don't know, you'd have to ask him. And, I say YOU because I'm tired of him, unamused by him, and weary of having to deal with his immaturity again.) I must have looked sad because Erin reached over and held my hand as if to say, " It'll be ok." For someone who's got a lot of shit happening in her life right now, she's incredibly perceptive and caring. Afterwards, a group of about ten of us went out to " The Cliffs" that overlook a lake in the area. We live in the middle of nowhere So, out on the lake you can see the whole sky and all of the stars. It was incredibly peaceful and incredibly beautiful. There was a little breeze blowing, but not enough that it made us shiver. The moon shone through the trees and onto the lake. We all seemed to curl up in two to three people huddles. We sang each other Pixies songs, and joked about throwing people into the lake. We decided to go home at about four. I fell asleep. I had a disturbing dream and woke up at about six. No, it must have been later than that, because I saw the sunrise. I fell asleep again until about 9:30 and then I got up and showered.
My first class of the day was incredibly disheartening. I never feel as dumb as I do when I'm sitting in front of 60 year old woman butchering her native language while she says, " Come on... It's common sense." And, whereas I know better, a foreign language isn't going to come to me as common sense, she's right, I should be better. I ripped my contact in my second class, don't ask me how because I don't know. I rode the bus home teary eyed so I could take care of it. And, now I'm at work. I want to jab a pencil into my left ear it hurts so much (and for some reason I think that will make it better.) I have faith that the day will end well, though, because I found a note in my backpack from Erin that has her new phone number on it.

Now, If I could just get my ears to stop hurting....
Added much later...I had been done with work for about two hours when my friend Jonathon stopped by. He woke me up, which was fine, I was on my way to a nightmare. Jonathon and I are a lot alike. He seems to be just as frustrated with everything that is going on here as I am. We went to Perkins in search of cinanmon rolls and cherry coke. We sang to each other. Lately I've been wishing I had one desire... And Baby, I love you. That's why I'm leaving. There's just no talking to you, and there's just no pleasing you. I care enough that I'm mad... So my day ended with a smile.
It's two twenty one friday morning... in eight hours I'll be driving to Auburn to chill with Jason and some of my old friends... three hours, straight interstate. I'll be damned if I stay awake, and I already had enough caffeine for three weeks worth of ulcers today. 'Twas carpe diems birthday, so everyone got free coffee... I spent most of my day there, typing up 10 pages or so of handwritten text for Sins of the Fathers.
I can't wait to get to Auburn... fly skimmies, old friends and a good brew awaits. But now 'tis time for sleep.


GRRR. This new amplifier setup is far from Hi-Fi... I wonder where that 50 hz hum comes from, maybe some sort of boxthingmagic should do the trick - but I'm not a Hi-Fi freak so I don't know... =(

I'm listening to MechWarrior 2 soundtrack... wonderful stuff. I also listened to the Starcraft Terran tunes, because, um, those tunes are among the greatest tunes to start the day with =)

Anyway, I'm off to the University soon... Maybe I should get some experience with things like Python and Perl's object oriented interface.

And, oh, about the recent Editor log topic on "Are Logs Ideas Or Things": I node mine as ideas. A "log" is a "thing" all right; Instance of "log" is an "idea" because it merely describes something, while not being anything other than the description itself. Just my personal weird way of putting it, no need to monkey the idea =)


I just moved my home page to my new ISP... I hope the iki.fi redirection gets updated soon!

Now, to the Uni...


Oh goddamn it...

Okay, first an announcement: Python is a decent programming language.

Then another announcement: If anyone says it's kewler than Perl (at least today), I'll personally disembowel them. Understood?

Okay, the scenario: I have one shell script here that has become Dangerously Big And Scary so I need to use some real scripting language. I first thought of Rexx or Perl, but decided to use Python just for chance (and to learn).

(FWIW, Debian seems to have Python 1.5 or something. So if any of these idiocies I list below are fixed, I will eat my words about that...)

Now... How do I convert sh backtick operation to Python? Perl accepts it allright with no specific tinkering... The original shell script had this:

declare freemem=`free | grep Swap | perl -ane 'print @F[3],"\n";'`;

Since the documentation and tutorial didn't tell me that, I resorted to this:

mi = open('/proc/meminfo', 'r')
meminfo = mi.readlines()[-1]

freeswap = re.sub('^SwapFree:\s+', '', meminfo)
freeswap = re.sub('\s+\w+B$', '', freeswap)

Which may or may not be Cool from porter's point of view...

And then I ran into the Really BIG headache...

freeswap = string.atoi(freeswap)
swaplimit = (int)((3.0/4.0) * freeswap)

You know... the distinction between string, integer and float types are too strong in Python for my tastes. Furthermore, all regular expression and string functions are hidden behind packages!

I said (3/4)*freeswap but then it returned 0. I found out that I needed to convert the integer to string (Perl does that automatically)... so what happened now? Still 0. Grrrrr. Then I remembered the Nights of Horror I had had with other languages ages ago... (3.0/4.0)*freeswap => HAR! it started to give understandable results... Should have just said 0.75 all along!

Oh, and I had to typecast it too. "We are the People of Programming Republic of Perl. We don't do that sort of thing."

Beats mucking around with expr any day, though, if you expect me to say something positive...

::WWWWolf sighs:: Two hours, and 9 lines of the original script ported! You know, they say it's easier to port a shell than a shell script... =)

What else I did today? Well, I watched a bit of Hackers movie... R00l1nG Skr1pt k1dd0 m00v1, d00dz!!11!1!11


I hacked again some Emacs-Lisp to get my mind away from that Python shock... results are available, as usual!


(See small matter of programming. Yeah, the Python script above was definitely a SMOP by that definition... =)

Other day logs o' mine...

Noded today by y.t.: expr backtick
Updated: Small helpful scripts for noders

Last night afforded me the delights of a special UK preview of the latest teen 'romp' flick 'Road Trip' at the expense of a friends company who rented out the theatre for their clients (of which I am clearly not one!).

The film itself was a mildly amusing relatively un-PC knob gag style affair in the mould of American Pie but not quite as funny, the meal prepared by said friend afterwards of Steak au Poivre, swede, carrot and butter mashed potato and corn on the cob was a more memorable affair, but the journey from work to the cinema was perhaps the highlight of the evening.

It's not that it was a wild and crazy affair with all sorts of capers, conundrums, coincidence and the like, it just kind of reminded me why I like London at night.

The car ride from where I work (Canary Wharf, Docklands) to Soho takes me past tobacco dock, the Tower of London, London Bridge, along the embankment of the River Thames, through Trafalger Square and Nelson's column, Picadilly Circus, Shaftesbury Avenue and into the depths of Soho itself, a square mile of sleaze, excitement, trendiness, sexuality, crime, drink, drugs, wealth, and poverty all rolled up into one glorious maze of interlocking streets, alleyways and phone-booths extoling the virtues of flesh-for-sale.

After somehow aquiring a free parking space (which is no mean feat as anyone who frequents the area will tell you)I strolled down Carnaby Street, past the mods and trendies, onto Berwick Street, past the rotting vegetables left over from a days trading, a smell which, when combined with the smog of London produces the aroma which is distinctively Soho.

It alwasy amuses me that not 5 yards from this market which serves old ladies, as well as young children are doorways with badly handwritten notes taped to the gaudily painted walls saying simply "Models" which lead to the £20 a time ladies of the night (and day). It always surprises me that the cross section of males willing to procure said ladies "services" is so varied, young, old, rich looking, tramp-a-likes, ugly and goodlooking all require relief from the sex workers of Soho.

Around the corner in Wardour Street the night is kicking off in the uber-trendy bars, clubs and restaurants where celebs can be spotted in abundance if you know the right place to look.

As I passed down to cross the road at Shatftesbury avenue towards Leicester Street you literally have to barge your way past the orientals emerging from Chinatown and the tourists exiting the Angus steakhouses (why they eat there, on display with the horrid red velvet seating and vile green serviettes I'll never know) and heading for the many tourists shops to buy their Union Jacks and the "My friend went to London and all I got was this lousy t-shirt" t-shirts.

As I took the last few back streets on the way to Leicester Square I encountered the other Londoners who were also using these little known thoroughfares to avoid the masses.

As I enetered the square itself the usual collection of street performers, musicians and peachers were there to greet me.

And then my night began.

back | days | forth

It seems that while I am away from work recuperating, they have decided to move everybody around. I would therefore like to place a bet; that my desk will be situated in such a way as to maximise the visibility of my monitor to my manager and to maximise the distraction from people walking past my desk. Open plan offices suck. :-(

My last week day away from work. Somehow I haven't accomplished even 5% of what I wanted to. Specifications have gone unread, applications gone unwritten and new knowledge has gone unlearnt... It's a little worrying that I don't care, that I know for certain when I get back to work that I will be doing the same old job without the fetching and carrying. Despite his promises of programming and learning, I know that my project leader will want me to administer our terrible source control system rather than better myself.

It's also rather bemusing in a sad way that I am already stressed about work, even without going back there...

Today is my last day at work for 2 weeks! Hurrah.

This means

  1. I get to relax and not think about work for a fortnight - a much needed break
  2. I get to spend more time with my wife.
  3. I won't be on E2 much (my dialin access is sucky)
Don't miss me too much. During the next two weeks I'm hoping to do all of the following (dontcha just love lists?) I'm very excited about all of this, and will be sunily noding it on my return to an internet-connected world on November 6, 2000. What's more, tonight I'm going to Chichester to go to a fair / fayre and maybe a pub too. Ooooh. Social Life.

I think I'll miss the gel more than it will miss me, but that is only right. I am but a speck in its gelatinous eye, while it's mass fills my otherwise meaningless world.

Or something.


What this Friday mean to Tannor:

I get to sleep an hour later, or get up at the same time and node on E2 for an hour. (this node should tell you which i chose...)
My Chem hw is due. Thank god i spent two hours last night doing that. I doubt i would have been able to do it during my lunch.
Tonight, i have to search the wasteland of Ithaca and Cornell University for something to do. Sure, there are always frat parties, but that is the problem: There are ALWAYS frat parties.
My dirty laundry is piling up. If i don't do some laundry this weekend, i may have to go to class naked on Monday. I hate going to class naked.

Only three more days until mole day!! Go mole day!
Hoorah! for flex-time. I will be working until 11:00 AM today. Then I will be lunching like a Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy editor. I probably won't be back until the office. They'll need a network administrator pro tempore around these parts.

Actually after several 12 hours days, I'm flexing out early today since there's no overtime this week.

I gave a presentation on our new VPN yesterday. They fricking applauded, cheered even, at the end. Now that it's up and working, several ppl get to telecommute. I'm feeling the love from them. Gotta love PoPToP

Today is "I don't like Mondays."

I'm happy for a change, because I'm about to drop my CS class. Ugh, I shouldn't be happy about that, but it's a temporary happiness. Soon I'll be grim again.

Why am I dropping out of it? I'd like to think it's the teacher, but maybe I'm just a dumbass. You see, there's this prof who's the biggest bitch. She comes in fifteen minutes late, then tells us how much she hates her job and then reads from our CS text as if it were somekind of storybook. And this storybook has absolutely nothing to do with the to-be assignments. Yes, I know. This is the college professor and I must learn to endure them. Unfortunately, I can't and I'm withdrawing before it screws with my GPA.

Ugh...and always thought that CS was going to be my major. I think everybody does...but not me.

...and today, I looked at the sky again:

And into the arms of darkness, I rest.
The rage of the sky and His furrowing brow.
His red shadow slowly creeps and I cower,
I cower like a child, because-
Because, there are no reasons...
To all the mothers of the world (or E2 I should say):
Your children love you very much.
Exercise log:

  • Situps - 100
  • Pushups - 25
  • Side-kicks - 25, each side
Insomnia: None, but overslept instead.

I think I'll stop recording the back arches, since they're mainly a stretch to recover after the crunches/situps, much like a good stretch after the side-kicks makes my butt feel good.

I did nothing for my birthday yesterday. I bought myself a Genica MP3/CD player off of Ebay, and while it's a good idea, I'm not so sure I like it yet. More info in that node later.

Dad called yeterday and told me my Uncle Edward passed away in his sleep. He said it was time to go had a bowl of ice cream and some heart medication then died peacefully in his sleep. Dad said we're to have dinner Sunday night with my cousin Farissa and her husband Floyd. They're in Phoenix for the rodeo now I'm not sure they may go back to Texas for Uncle Edward's funeral on Saturday at Kempner Baptist Chruch in Lampassass. Dad also said they had found basal cell carcinoma near the right corner of his eye. A small spot he's having removed and then some reconstructive surgery ....maybe.

I had my dental checkup yesterday with Dr. Mackintossh, we all call him Dr. Mac for short. A good Christian man a lot like Mr. Rogers is his manners and ways. I met him as a result of my illness and common friends we share. He's in his 70's and just crazy about Volkswagons. On my first visit he took me out back to show me the newest edition of the VW that he had ordered and built from a kit. A real one!! Before Volkwagon even released them! He has a room FULL of Volkswagons memoriabilia he collects and models he has built. We talked about when the Lord came into our lives and when we said goodbye he gave me a hug and his personal phone number to keep in touch saying he would remember me in his prayers. There was great comfort for me in that simple act. He has won several awards for ballroom dancing at the Westward Look Resort. A rich and full life he lives. His wife has suffered from Alziemer's for the past 26 years and Dr. Mac took care of her as long as he possibly could, even going so far as to build a room at his office where he could care for her. She's in a nursing home now where she sits all day with her special dolly on her lap. Yesterday, he came to the door and rushed out as I pulled in to park all excited to tell me she spoke to him last Saturday for the first time in three years! He said, I reached in her mouth to pull her partial plate out and she said, Don't do that! schrunching up his face like she must have all angry-like. Through my illness we also share a common friend, Juanell. She was the one who, when it was time for me to begin physical rehab took me up to the gym and got me enrolled. Now her brain lesions are back and the doctor says she has 6 months at the most to live.

I'll never forget the first one to go....that was John. We were in the hospital together, the staff had left us alone in a room to watch a video about brain surgery(a transphenoidectomy) .......it was all so very frightening and we were so alone....he reached over and gently held my hand as we watched. A few days later John suffered a stroke and they wheeled him by me in a wheelchair his face all bloated red and staring off into the nowhere his mind had gone. I tried to say hello, but the nurse kept going. I was shocked and so painfully sad to know he didn't recognize me anymore.

I watch them all go one by one and wonder why I am so spared and they are not. Sometimes all I can express is grief and despair and wonder how these encounters are divine appointments?


We know that all things work together for good to those who are called asccording to his purpose.
- Romans 8:28 (NRSV)


Rally, baby, rally!!

I must say, yesterday was a good day. The market went up, I finished a programming project, had a fantastically fun date, nice weather, good dinner.... what else is there?

However, despite the market going up, I balanced my checkbook today and noted that that account currently has $0.00 in it.

I'm feeling like a dot-bomber who sunk all his money into the stock market. Which is patently untrue, although I feel mildly important because of this.

Such are the trials of college.

21.01 bst

iiiiiiiiiiits friday!

I'm not overly happy today, not entirely sure why.

I'm also not sure if I'd prefer to be out at the union just now. damn indecision... Trouble is, I hadn't been able to work out if anyone else was going or not. even if none of my friends were at the GU, I'd have been able to find my cousin at Cheesy Pop. But I'm kinda tired, which is bad.

But then there's tomorrow night. i know i'll be able to find a bunch of people from my school with their med student friends in the beer bar. we did last week, and had fun. but tom's going, and he's not fun on nights out - he can get carried away with his drinking and i'm usually the one who ends up making sure he gets home (or, at least, to a bed).

steven will be there too. i cannot stand the presence of his company. he is one of the few people who i have an inherent dislike of. i think he realises this, but i'm not sure i can cope with him for a whole night.

I can always hope that that lot go home early-ish. Like when the beer bar closes. Because I'm not sure that they like the Hive. but steven dancing? urgh.

as for the rest of today? materials lecture, good, due to lecturer with sense of humour. maths tutorial, good, due to ability to work out what went wrong. and then a two hour maths lecture? urgh, hell. the guy next to me got a high score of 702 on Snake on my phone. Jordan got a paper plane from the back row right down to the blackboard.

Had lunch with people from my course. Elspeth and Grant are crazy.. I went up to the library with Grant to look up stuff for the assignment for Monday, and discovered that the book I needed wasn't on campus, but at the Art School library, which shut in an hour's time. Mad dash. Got book.

I stopped into the Nokia shop on Buchanan Street, to ask about a software upgrade for my phone. Not possible. But I got talking to the guys there, they showed me the new 3310, gave me a new logo on my phone, and gave me the number of the person to call if I wanted a job there, or at DX Comms. Cool. :)

At home, my sis was being pretty obtuse, and mum was trying to counteract it by being patronising. not fun either.

21.44 bst

changed my mind. now in bad mood. tom has suggested staying out till 5. i need to find other people to hang out with at nights.

on the other hand, t in the park highlights are on bbc choice. what better way to while away a friday night than to watch people get soaked while listening to fantastic live music. i was there!
aah, brilliant.. hey jude with the bootleg beatles

naa-na-na-na-naa-na-na-naaa.... na-na-na-naa, hey jude

23.19 bst

dammit, there are reasons why i don't like various people on my buddy list to talk to various other people. if i want to bitch to rach about tom, i don't want rach to know who tom is. i think this is why i don't like to talk about deep&meaningful stuff to irl friends. because i'm paranoid. i don't feel comfortable telling certain things to someone who is a good friend of the person involved.

Now I'm pissed off. If I were in a cartoon, there would be a single squiggly line above my head.


I'm so glad its Friday. Its been quite the week.

I'm going to Seattle this weekend to visit the Seattle Art Museum and the Experience Music Project. Unfortunately, this means that I will be missing the Portland E2 get together. That sucks, but LordOmar told me that if it goes well, there will be others. I certainly hope so! I would cancel this trip actually, but we've been planning it for a while and this is the last weekend before the end of the year that works for my boyfriend and I to go to Seattle.

I've been sick all week. I went to the doctor on Wednesday, and it turns out I have bronchitis. I have been taking antibiotics, and I feel a little better, but I still keep coughing at the most inconvenient times, usually when I have a customer on the phone.

There isn't much to say right now since I'm at work and I have three other things I want to do before I go home, mostly involving configuring one of my computers for streaming audio so I don't have to bring CD's to work every day. I think I'm going to end up getting an X Drive account or something to save my MP3 collection from home on so I can listen to them at work.

I hope everyone has a safe weekend. :)

Nodes That I Wrote Recently:
"relations" with a statue

You should read the The Great Grand E2 Book Lotto node.

CD’s I’ve Listened To Today:
mostly dance compilations from Revolution magazine.

Today’s Horoscope on my Calendar (Aries) - No moping or projecting your anger on others. Leo Moon aligning with Venus brings new life for art projects on the back burner. Inject spice and pizzazz into romance. Try out a new restaurant tonight and let the good times roll.

The housemate that drives to San Rafael every morning dropped me off a block away from my work.

A man was bicycling down the street that runs in front of my office building. Attached to the the seat of his bicycle was one of those folding grocery carts. Inside the grocery cart was an LP gas canister. Looked a little dangerous to me. The I wouldn't do that myself level of danger, uncomfortable to watch. Maybe I'm a wuss, but I see a bike accident once a week, none of them involving propane, though. He has a salt and pepper beard wears a big floppy hat. The alarming thing, however, is the maraca in his right hand, with which he beats time as his pedals along oblivious to the traffic backing up behind him.

Well, after another break from writing daylogs (and nodes), here we go again. Had class in the morning (Image Processing lab), but focusing on the afternoon's big party.

UAB's Festa (that's catalan for party), one of the biggest events I know. I didn't come last year, but I did three and four years ago. Got badly drunk on both of them, but not this year (two vodkas). It was a real blast, but it's a weird party; it starts at about 3 p.m. and everyone is drunk before ten. Then they recover and go elsewhere for more; but our party was very tired and we left, like one hour ago. Mireia gave me a lift home and that's it.

I faked a migraine today and did nothing by lay in my bed listening to Radiohead. Brings meaning to the Barenaked Ladies' lyric "sleep away the afternoon". I had so many tests in school which I wasn't prepared for, and I needed a break from life. I'm sure everyone in school really missed my sarcasm and bastardosity. My mom ended up catching on to my process of getting my ethernet back, but I convinced her otherwise, I'm good at social engineering. Tonight my parents are out and everyone I know is in band playing at a football game. And I've got PSATs tomorrow. *sighs*

I've accomplished something that should've been done last year -- interview one of the actors in the college theatre department. A graduate student in Brooklyn College is studying for a two-year Masters of Fine Arts (MFA) degree, and he's doing a play by George Bernard Shaw called You Never Can Tell. I saw the guy last year, he should have been interviewed because of his work. By interviewing him, I can get a free ticket to see tonight's show, give good publicity for the theatre department, and I can flex my self-taught theatre journalism muscles if I have any.

This morning I had planned to do nothing... I had woken up at noon, and missed class (again). I decided to visit my friend Valerie at 2:00 PM, as I often do, but her class (choir) was still in session, and I left at 2:20 PM after I got tired of waiting. I then proceded to the Sunnyvale Caltrain station at 3:20 PM and surprised my ex-boyfriend Matthew (who I am still good friends with).

Matthew and I had an early supper at a wonderful Italian resturant and then returned to his place at 5:00, where we played with his network for a while. I went home around 7:00 PM because my parents decided to have a spontanious party, and wanted me to be there. So, I had to entertain my friend Brian and his girlfriend. We watched Addams Family Values and started on Life of Brian before they left. I haven't yet heard from my boyfriend (Matthew, not to be confused with the ex-boyfriend Matthew), which bothers me slightly. Now I shall node, and then fall asleep.

I want up and downvote buttons on this whole damn world.

Yesterday i was meandering through Northwest Portland, just walking. A man and woman emerged from a building - he locked the door behind them and they fell in behind me on the relatively empty sidewalk.

"Are you familiar with this area?" he asked.
(No! Tell me stuff!)
"A little, just a few places," it seemed she answered: she was indistinct.
He pointed out a couple of "great" shops - full of wicker gewgaws, enamel dingbats, and ceramic whatsits.. things with rotund smiling faces where no faces belonged, and mummified former greenery - all fit for spending one's abundance of excess money. I developed a rather scornful attitude toward his taste. The he pointed out a corner store, the only store on the block with people going in and out, the kind of store with windows completely obscured by cigarette and lotto ads and specials on Wonder Bread and soap, with two cracked plastic lawn chairs on the sidewalk by the door.
"I consider that to be the last --
(spark of life?)
-- eyesore on this block. I'm going to buy that building and rip it out. This is my new building, just bought it this week. Come on in."
I had literally covered my ears, but heard the jingle of his keys anyway.

Maybe this man is someone's hero, someone's example. (A self-made man? It's possible.) But at that moment, he made my stomach churn. I wanted to break down the door and hurt him in unpleasant ways.

I couldn't tell you why. If he's the "gentry" in gentrification, then - probably - so am i, or will be when i have a job. I suppose i'm just playing along.

I've travelled this whole world and seen lots of funny men
some will rob you with a six-gun and some with a fountain pen
but everywhere I've rambled and everywhere I've roamed,
I've never seen an outlaw drive a family from their home."1
Today I went to DC for the first time I can remember. Man, what a city. From here at GMU, in Fairfax, my friend Rob and his extremely beautiful+smart+nice+rich girlfriend drove to the Metro Station. I bought a $5 day pass rather than two $2.80 tickets (one for ride there, one for way back). The ride over on the Metro was pretty uneventful, it was fun looking out of window at people though.

We arrived at Union Station late for the movie Bambuzal (we're supposed to watch it for my Reading Cultural Signs class). Union Station used to be the old train station, but was converted into a Metro Station/food court/mall/movie theater. The building itself is huge- the ceiling is maybe 2-3 stories high, huge statues are all along the wall, and it goes several floors underground too. Being in such a gigantic place with so many people all running somewhere was definitly an experience.

The movie was okay... had some really funny parts, but otherwise I wouldn't have watched it if it wasn't required. We talked afterwards about it, none of us knew what to make of the ending. It seemed as though the writer couldn't figure out an ending that would tie up the movie's theme, so he (WARNING: SPOILER) just kills everybody.

After the movie we walked around Union Station some more. I found some payphones and got their numbers (I have a collection of payphone numbers- don't ask). Again, Metro ride back was uneventful- I mostly stared out window thinking about religion (and it's relationship specifically to humans) while Rob+Jessica played with his cell phone. On the way out of the train station I gave my day-pass to this older black woman who was on her way into the station. She had her arms full of bags and looked really exhausted. After I gave her my pass she was stunned and then this really happy expression came over her. I felt really good from that. I almost wished I had more than one day-pass so I could hand more out.

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