By
Francis Bacon
HE THAT hath wife and children hath given
hostages to fortune; for they are impediments to great enterprises, either of virtue or mischief. Certainly the best works, and of greatest
merit for the public, have proceeded from the unmarried or childless men; which both in affection
and means, have married and endowed the public.
Yet it were great reason that those that have children, should have greatest care of future times;
unto which they know they must transmit their
dearest pledges. Some there are, who though they
lead a single life, yet their thoughts do end with
themselves, and account future times impertinences. Nay, there are some other, that account
wife and children, but as bills of charges. Nay
more, there are some foolish rich covetous men,
that take a pride, in having no children, because
they may be thought so much the richer. For perhaps they have heard some talk, Such an one is a
great rich man, and another except to it, Yea, but
he hath a great charge of children; as if it were an
abatement to his riches. But the most ordinary
cause of a single life, is liberty, especially in certain
self-pleasing and humorous minds, which are so
sensible of every restraint, as they will go near to
think their girdles and garters, to be bonds and
shackles. Unmarried men are best friends, best
masters, best servants; but not always best subjects; for they are light to run away; and almost
all fugitives, are of that condition. A single life
doth well with churchmen; for charity will hardly
water the ground, where it must first fill a pool. It
is indifferent for judges and magistrates; for if
they be facile and corrupt, you shall have a servant, five times worse than a wife. For soldiers, I
find the generals commonly in their hortatives,
put men in mind of their wives and children; and
I think the despising of marriage amongst the
Turks, maketh the vulgar soldier more base. Certainly wife and children are a kind of discipline
of humanity; and single men, though they may
be many times more charitable, because their
means are less exhaust, yet, on the other side, they
are more cruel and hardhearted (good to make
severe inquisitors), because their tenderness is not
so oft called upon. Grave natures, led by custom,
and therefore constant, are commonly loving hus-
bands, as was said of Ulysses, vetulam suam praetu-
lit immortalitati. Chaste women are often proud
and froward, as presuming upon the merit of their
chastity. It is one of the best bonds, both of chastity
and obedience, in the wife, if she think her hus-
band wise; which she will never do, if she find him
jealous. Wives are young men's mistresses; com-
panions for middle age; and old men's nurses. So
as a man may have a quarrel to marry, when he
will. But yet he was reputed one of the wise men,
that made answer to the question, when a man
should marry, - A young man not yet, an elder
man not at all. It is often seen that bad husbands,
have very good wives; whether it be, that it raiseth
the price of their husband's kindness, when it
comes; or that the wives take a pride in their
patience. But this never fails, if the bad husbands
were of their own choosing, against their friends'
consent; for then they will be sure to make good
their own folly.
Of Parents and Children | Index | Of Envy