(The scene: a park bench on a bright, sunny day somewhere in the Deep South.)

Lady #1: And so my husband bought me this diamond ring for our engagement.

Lady #2: Well, that's nice.

Lady #1: Then he bought me this diamond necklace for our wedding!

Lady #2: That's nice!

Lady #1: Then, for our first anniversary, he bought me this diamond bracelet! But enough about me! Didn't you just have an anniversary?

Lady #2: Yes, we did. Our fifth.

Lady #1: Oh, how sweet! What did he get you?

Lady #2: Etiquette lessons.

Lady #1: Etiquette lessons? What on earth did they teach you?

Lady #2: Well, the first lesson was on how to say "That's nice" instead of "Fuck you!"

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