I was arrested this morning on charges stemming from my killing of the Carved Soother by pulling his spine out of his body through his mouth. At one o'clock I was released following a phone call from President Trump, giving me a full pardon and telling the liberal police force that I seemed like a very fine person to him. That is not faint praise as The Lord Our God rarely praises anyone. Usually he calls them what they are, such as "Dogheaded Man" and "Face Like and Old Plaster Wall in a Building that is Being Demolished that was built in the 1920s." Agreeing with me that these were made up charges by the Democrats to keep me from voting in the upcoming election did He. They actually believe a Democrat could get elected in Maryland - they are obviously deluded because it isn't like we are Delaware which employs my nemesis Joe Biden in some capacity. They probably go so far as to give him walking around money and other perks offered in Delaware. Who even lives there anyway? The whole state is the size of a rowboat. Sad.
Checking out of prison was a humiliating experience. I had to go down and pick up my personal property at a counter that looked like it was some inner city YMCA locker room. Smelled that way too. I requested to be sent to the rich people's prison but they refused. I know that Martha Stewart was allowed to have a garden and raise a family when she was in rich people's prison so I wanted that kind of deal. I picked up my clothes and other belongings (including the spine of the Carved Soother which I intend to mount over my fireplace).
This log is a commentary on unequal justice. I was not treated fairly because I am wealthy and need to be sent to the rich people's prison. I will be filing a civil suit against the state of Maryland and the city of Old Baltimore later this week. Seems the sensible thing to do.