Televisions Require Plenty of Sunlight and Daily Watering

Or

Justification of My Own Stupidity

Or

The Indirect Solution to a Problem

Recently I acquired two green bean seeds from a friend’s garden. I planted one of the seeds in a generic brown pot full of dirt in my apartment. Every morning at eight a.m. after pulling the window shades to let the sun’s rays reign over the plant, I gathered a glass of tap water and quenched the plant’s thirst. Within three days, a green protuberance shot upward among the dirt.

A week later, while going about the morning ritual of watering the plant, a "zap" noise made me jump in fright. I considered the bean plant was talking, perhaps voicing approval for being watered, or voicing disapproval for my flooding its gourmet tastes with ordinary tap water. (Maybe these particular seeds require Poland Springs. Or Brita-filtered?) Rationality soon explained the noise: Apparently I overlooked something "important".

Ahhh...Did I mention the bean plant sat atop my television?

I pushed the televisions "on" button. I plugged the television into a different power outlet and tried again. Both attempts proved fruitless.

Obviously, water dripping from the pot was the reason for the television’s demise, but I was curious about the extent of the damage. So my neighbor and I got on hands and knees and opened the television with a screwdriver. Peering at the clump of electrical gadgetry that looked to be the main circuit board, we noticed green mold-like streaks crisscrossing the length of that electronic mishmash and a pool of water stagnating amongst the metals and wires. Evil looking black soot marks and a severely melted exploded fuse rounded out the damage; I had watered the television to destruction.

Now resting in its generic brown pot upon a windowsill, the green bean plant continues to thrive; soon I’ll have homegrown green beans. The television lies dormant on the front porch, its artificial guts exposed to view. I ponder why a box with electronics, sending light rays to be gathered by the eyes garners more use of one’s time than an appreciation of the real world: the sunlight, a sunset, people, newspapers, the trees or a simple living bean plant. And I now notice a difference; the resiliency of life, as opposed to the inflexibility and artificiality of television and its presentations.



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