display | more...
Table Of Contents

Appendix I - Mix 'n' Match

Here are some useful phrases for your perusal and use.

Instructions for use:
Take any phrase from group A, followed by one from group B, and so on, until group F. Put them together and you will have a complete sentence. A taylor-made insult, so to speak.

Group A                             Group B                               Group C        Group D
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Lick my dick (cunt),                you pathetic                          fat,	       cocksucking
Suck my schlong (pussy),            you bloody	                   fat,	       homosexual
Eat my ass,                         you fucking	                   fat,	       genetically engineered
Fuck you,                           you bloody fucking                    fat,	       sexually transmitted
I piss on your mother,              you goddamn                           fat,           excrement of a(n)
Is that really your face?           you goddamn fucking                   fat,           dirty little
Massage my testicles (urethra),     you goddamn bloody                    fat,           dog-breathed
I fucked your sister last night,    you goddamn bloody fucking pathetic   fat,           toxic
Excuse me,                          you	                            portly,        not-so-nice

Group E                          Group F
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
disease of the pelvis,           why don't you just fuck off?
misfit of society,               oh, I'm sorry, I thought you were your sister.
used car salesman,               take a shower, you smell like your father.
malfunctioning bladder,          go play with yourself, as usual.
idiot,                           you're so ugly when you were young, your mother threw you out of 
                                   the window and was fined for littering.
vagina,                          you look like a zit.
tax collector,                   is that a match in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
elephant man,                    and stop trying to look at your asshole in the mirror.
person                           stop bothering me, please.
N.B. If the person you are addressing is not fat, Group C is optional.


Back to Chapter XII- Excerpt from the 1992 World Insulting Championship Final in Brussels (Vassilyevich vs. White) . . . Forward to FAQ

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.