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Chapter II - Who do I insult?

First of all - it's whom do I insult - do I have to teach you everything? Asshole. Second of all, it's not whom you insult, but whom don't you insult. It's fun to insult, so insult as much as possible. There are, however, certain people you may wish not to insult. These will probably be:

  1. People who give you grades,
  2. People who give you money,
  3. People who give you head,
  4. People who can beat the crap out of you,
  5. People ranking above you in PENIS SIZE - Principal Elan, Non sequitur and Insulting Scale of the Society of Infamous Zesty Elites.

At the moment, your PENIS SIZE is negligible. By the end of the essay, you will have come a long way, however it will take you years of practice to have a respectable PENIS SIZE.

N.B. Although the PENIS SIZE also measures elan and non sequitur, which are, by their nature, related to insulting, these will remain outside the scope of this essay.


Back to Chapter I - Why should I insult? . . . Forward to Chapter III - How do I insult?

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