If you have never heard of the
Hinduja Affair or the
Millennium Dome you may want to read some background, e.g. http://www.guardian.co.uk/dome/article/0,2763,490379,00.html
An
area of the
brain, situated somewhere along the right (to you) side. This sector is used
by
God to define whether or not the
person involved will be given
Faith and when. A vital
characteristic of The
Faith Zone (an
analogue computational
system) is its ability to
execute the '
ENLIGHTEN'
equation accurately. This is the very complex
equation that decides
for the
Lord when someone will be given
Belief, considering important factors such as how
much
money the being in question has and ensuring that most
poor who are given
faith are
condemned to
Catholicism.
The
Zone shares its name with a part of
Britain's infamous
Millennium Dome:
This Is No
Coincidence!
The
Big Guy Upstairs spotted the
title in some early
Dome plans and, not being one to miss
an opportunity, adopted it immediately for his most
treasured
domain in the
brain. After
several problematic months of attempting to implement his
Equation,
He was forced into
pulling off an, it has to be said
phenomenal, piece of
business-cross-networking.
After
consultation, Good
God was referred to none other than
Peter Mandelson by their mutual
('Above's closest
head-of-
government)
friend,
Tony Blair.
Mandy, of course having that
little extra
slyness, spotted the obvious
solution. Peter sent the
Creator directly to the
Hinduja Brothers, whom he had just struck a deal with over their
sponsorship of
his
Faith Zone - that in the
Dome, which he was responsible for filling on behalf
of the
Labour Government.
The
Hindujas only saw one problem - that areas of the brain known only to
God
(at the time) get very little good
publicity (Little did they know of The big
Tent's
future...).
God, with his
universal influence, offered the brothers a few extra
bits and
bobs - including a '
word' in some
Indian judge's
ears; '
passports' to his
realm (A
location, though not quite so
pleasant as
Britain, with a
mystically attractive
supernatural feel) and the
Express Newspaper Group (He had momentarily forgotten contradictory
obligations to
porn baron Richard Desmond). The
Hindujas were
bought,
and so was
born The Faith Zone(2).
I should add that, most
suspiciously, Dome
parallels with
divine sponsorship do not end
there.
British Airways - another
company involved with
Mandy's Big
Erection
on the
South Bank - agreed with
god to take a 70% share in a more physically indentifiable
bodily function - the
mechanisms leading to
Deep-Vein Thrombosis!