The First Book of Everything

The First Book of Everything

1 In the begining, Nathan created the database.
2 And upon examining the database, he decided it was very
3 cool and hoopy. And he said unto the database,
4 "Behold! You are my database, my creation that I give
5 unto the masses of people. You will be successful
6 and you will spread over the whole World Wide Web
7 assimilating all knowledge that you are fed."
8 And Nathan named the database "Everything", and gave it
9 to the masses of people, who thought it was rather hoopy
10 and assimilated themselves into it, feeding Everything with
11 knowledge, and Nathan was pleased.

12 One day many months later Nathan came down to the world
13 to examine the progress of his database. He saw that
14 it had become wrecked by misspellings and by un-hoopy nodes
15 like MR. T ATE MY BALLS!, and he was apalled by the
16 abuse of softlinks. He could not tolerate this any longer
17 So he said unto the noders, "My database has become crufty and un-hoopy,
18 and he said unto the noders "Lo, my database is very
19 un-froody and has thus disapointed me. I shall leave it
20 to rot, andin it's place I will raise up a new database,
21 one that is much more powerful and will save us all from
22 crappy nodes." And Nathan returned to Nodevana,
23 leaving his followers to wait for the coming of the
24 Second Database.

And thus ends The First Book of Everything.