A
back itch is the most annoying itch there is, ( except for the
bottom-of-the-foot itch when you are wearing
army boots or other not-easily-removable shoes).
The strength of the itch is inversly proportional to the reach, as we all know, and, especially with clothing, it's sometimes impossible to scratch.
Until today, you were stuck with:
"Could you please scratch my back?"
"Where?"
"Umm.... in the middle...no, more to the left,
no, MY left, a bit up, no, that's too much.
Dammit! lower down.... Aaaarrrggghhh! Pass me
that ruler!"
No more, due to the Footprints back grid™. This is something I came up with , and so I will share my wisdom with you, fellow up-voters and c!-ers:
Imagine, if you will, your back as a Battleships grid, 10 by 10. Now number it. The right edge of your back is 'A'. Your left side is 'J'. The top of your back is '1', and the bottom (your bottom, if you will) is '10'. Now you have a grid. A-J horizontally and 1-10 vertically.
Say you want your back scratched in the middle, height-wise, and just to the left of your spine? That would be 'F5' or 'F6'. Just behind your right shoulder would be 'A1'. How simple is that?
My brother said I'm crazy every time he saw me tell my girlfriend "Can you scratch my back? D3."
And then one day he had a really nasty itch. He said "Footprints, can you please scratch my back?"
"Sure," I said, "where?"
He never called me crazy again.