"You mean you're not a doctor?"

    · · ·

"Well, you're lucky you only got it on your face, my dear! If it was your larynx that swelled up you'd be in real trouble, let me assure you!"

"Yepph, I pphuppophe pho".

"And whether using ranitidine in addition to diphenhydramine is worthwhile in this situation, well, that's debatable, but there is evidence that it gives a marginal benefit. The emphasis being on marginal!"

"Oh Ppphay".

    · · ·

"Just make yourself useful and take this down to pathology, will you?"

    · · ·

"You're all students, then?"

"Yep, looks like you're not special enough for a real doctor, hey!"

"Well, just don't let that old bastard back in. I thought I was gonna tear holes in the mattress when he put that local in."

"I think we just need to trim this fat a bit before we close it. You're not feeling this, are you?"

    · · ·

"Impression? Ah, just put query vaso-vagal, query dehydration, query fucked-if-I-know."

    · · ·

"It's always you big blokes with tats that can't handle needles."

"It don't hurt, it just don't feel right!"

"You can't fool me, your heart rate's right there on the monitor."


    · · ·

"My strangest admission … Well, there was a guy on ice who pulled out his eyeball in the triage room. Just, pop."

    · · ·

"I didn't wanna talk about this with my missus around, but ever since the op … the old fella, it just don't wanna work."

"Hmm, but how would you rate your chest pain, from one to ten?"

    · · ·

"How's things here?"


"Oh you shit, you've said the q word. Now the bloody ambulance is coming."

    · · ·

"So, how long till you're a doctor then, matey?"


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