Today I discovered I am one of those things that don't stick around very long. I am soon to be extinct, I am not a mutant for the better: I am a mutant for the worse. My genes suck.

I was walking down the street today, and walking towards me was a dirty looking man, stumbling along with his shirt in his hand, talking to himself. As I was passing him by a crowded outdoor cafe, he said to me, slowly and slurring:

"Hey man! Do you know where der hoshpidal is?"

I had no idea where any hospital was, but nevertheless I rubbed my chin and thought really hard.

"I'm sorry man", I said. "But I don't know."

I started edging away.

"Oh come on! Look! There's a hoshpidal!" he said, pointing at a car dealer's.

Well then, I thought. Problem solved. "Oh, I see. Cool, then you can go there, right?" I said, starting to edge away again.

"Naw, man!" he said. "I'm looking for der other hoshpidal."

I really didn't know where any hospital was, and he might have been looking for a place to buy a porsche anyway, so I just pointed down the road and said "I think there's one down that way."

We stood side by side, staring down the road. It was a mellow moment.

Then he turned to face me, slowly raised his arms with his hands clenched into fists, and said "I'm gonna fucking kill!"

There was an akward silence.

After a while, I asked if it was me was his going to kill, ready to turn and run like shit.

There was another silence, although personally I found this more tense than akward. To him, this was probably a strange moment too, as he had a lot to think about.

"Naw, man." He said, finally. "I'm not gonna kill you."

"Okay, thanks man." I said, turning, and walking away, past the rest of the coffee-consuming onlookers.

Then I felt the rush. Then I felt my knees begin to shake. What the hell's wrong with me? My adrenaline rush comes about 5 minutes late! This is a problem I'm well aware of and worried about. And why didn't I run like fuck before waiting to hear his answer? What if his answer was "YEP!" ? Then he would have reached out the full 6 inches and grabbed me.

And why didn't I call the cops? What if I turn on the news tonight and see "Wilshire Boulevard Murder"? And not only am I going to be the death of me, I'm going to be the death of everyone else too: I saw the I.D. tag on his wrist, why didn't I call an ambulance?

Anyway, even though I made sure he wasn't following me, about 8 blocks later I saw him out of the corner of my eye and about jumped a mile. Turned out it wasn't him though. I'm not too pleased about the way my defence system kicks in only when it doesn't matter......

Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.