Findings:

• I'm not going to simplify things just so they can fit inside your mind. You don't deserve that.
• I don't remember what her name was so let's call her Doris
• They made the sunrise for people like us just so we have an excuse for why we're still up.
• The "WE'RE GOING DOWN THE PUB!" Anglo-Swiss Post-nuptial London Meetup
• I feel like I don't know her for a moment. It passes.
• So couch, I hear you've been sleeping with her
• If this were in person, I would have kissed her now
• We were so young and dazzled
• If you don't know where you're going, any path will take you there
• We read your mail so you don't have to
• Don't stand so close to me
• I was watching through the window, you were going through the dances.
• She was so quiet that nobody heard her
• We're going to have to take Heidi home
• Don’t take life so serious, son; it ain’t nohow permanent
• We don't swim in yer toilet, so don't fuck us over or you'll need 2 wheelchairs, fool: An Partie
• I'm angry, and tired, and sad, and I just don't want to deal with it right now, so fuck off
• finding my way back to sanity again, though I don't really know what I'm going to do when I get there
• don't lose sight of the ground. hold onto the rocks.
• cover your eyes so you don't know the secret
• Don't tell me about her
• I don't lose the irony that I believe my reflection to be a stranger
• She is so beautiful, I gave up Nihilism for her
• She opened her eyes and spoke in a very normal voice, just as if she were sane
• We're acting happy to stop ourselves from going insane.
• the linear and the docile go feral at her command. we're on the run from rogue rivers and predatory trains.
• Windows were never meant to flicker so much
• Now that we're being so open and honest
• The endless blue sky is not big enough to hold her memories, so it doesn't
• The world is bleak and horrible and depressing, so I'm going to set it on fire and laugh
• You want to reassure her, but you don't know where to start
• We're flawed because we want so much more. We're ruined because we get these things and wish for what we had.
• Just so we’re all clear, it is okay to miss people who no longer want you in their lives
• I don't think I would want to date her now, anyway
• I don't think she even knows that I make her smile
• don't think so loudly; whisper something in my ear
• we never really fight, so I don't know how this is supposed to go
• I don't like your reality, I'm going to make my own
• So you don't have to
• Books Hazelnut Read So You Don't Have To (category)
• if you don't stop laughing I'm going to pour Mountain Dew on your bed
• If we ran this back an infinite number of times across infinite existences our souls would still never connect, so don't regret.
• this is it, we're going to die
• Songs Hazelnut Listened To So You Don't Have To
• I don't think I was rude to her, just cold and curt
• I am going to rewrite you so that I can still like people.
• What makes her so cute?
• I don't think of her
• Her eyes were beautiful in the moonlight
• Most of the men were disillusioned long before they met her
• We're going the right way. The forest goes deeper.
• We're Going On A Bear Hunt
• So I let her go
• she's so virginal in her bodily extortion
• her eyes were brimming with souls
• Here her lesser words were freed to tumble
• The reason we were so excited about Y2K
• And when she turned into a man, we were so proud
• He loved her so much, he wanted to do her autopsy
• One day we realized we were going to need a bigger car
• If the US is so great, why don't other countries give themselves to us?
• I don't want to fall so easily
• I slept so well, even my dreams were simple.
• We're not so different, you and I
• They Were Wrong, So We Drowned
• I don't think I realized what I had gotten myself into, but it seemed like the potential for fun and insanity were there in equal parts
• I know you don't read too good so I'll write slow
• Don't tell her she's beautiful
• Dogs don't have souls, so it doesn't matter
• Why you don't want to piss her off
• If you don't know, I'm not going to tell you
• So says the preacher man, but... I don't go by what he says
• I don't owe you sympathy. You owed it to her.
• We're blind. We're mortal. We don't know what the hell we're doing.
• Jesus loves you so I don't have to
• I don't tell her these things, and she doesn't ask
• Don't Kill Her Daddy with Careless Talk
• A floor is so you don't fall in the hole your house is in
• And if I don't die or worse I'm going to need a nap
• Don't believe us - we're all cultural prostitutes
• I am letting myself down so you don't have to
• Also, I don't think it's weird that we all love one another so much.
• Let's pretend we don't exist. Let's pretend we're in Antarctica!
• You haven't seen it and you don't understand. I have malice. I have cruelty. The little fire that's always been inside me isn't so little anymore.
• If they're going up to the sun, the stars and the moon, why don't they bring the moon down for us?
• One of the dangers of necromancy is you don't really know who's on the other side or what they're going to give you in return.
• I've praised the Lord so loudly, don't I deserve a little sin?
• I don't know what I don't know, so how do I know what to ask?
• I don't want to set the world on fire. I just want to start a flame in her heart.
• I'm going to do something stupid if I don't get laid
• I don't like her because she won't like me
• When the aliens attack my workplace, I'm going to be so damn READY
• I don't think we're old enough to know if we're alcoholics at our age
• Her heart is in little tiny pieces that are going to blow away.
• The Saudis were terrified that someone was going to be a better Muslim than they were
• We're Going On A Bug Hunt
• When men were men, women were women, and you knew where you were going in life
• So bashful when I spied her
• Her grief is still too young to behave itself, so she never lets it out
• If there's hell below we're all going to go
• so that all her children will be adventurers in light
• Her black eyes were surely the source of my angst
• So her hat does not blow away
• When she woke up, her hands were still dreaming
• Santa's festive fear mongering wasn't going as well as he'd hoped, but the other Santa and I were enjoying the gingerbread.
• You were never going to become more than this to me
• His ex-wife was so frigid, her clitoris was only the tip of the iceberg.
• She didn't wave goodbye so much as slightly raise her hand
• If you're going to complain about store policy, don't do it to the employees!
• Her eyes were gray like a storm, and even more dangerous
• you laugh and then you cry but you're still laughing but you miss her so damn much
• All of her seconds were unencumbered
• If the IRA are "terrorists," so were the French Resistance against the Nazis
• The reason why it's so hard to stay true to yourself is because it's so easy to lose yourself.
• you were so cute
• You were always so good to me
• Oh, that it were so simple. That I could just utter those words.
• you were angels, so much more than everything.
• Only her big toes were painted
• Son, do you know how fast you were going?
• I don't want to see her
• Just so we’re all clear, it is okay to miss people you no longer want in your life
• they couldn’t speak at all; so used to disuse were their tongues
• And forty days were fulfilled for him; for so are fulfilled the days of those which are embalmed
• The serpent was in the garden again, but there weren't any apples left in the tree, so I figured things were cool.
• It's just the three of us - you, me, and all that stuff we're so scared of
• the pull is so strong, we think we're moving forward
• we think we're so great. this is all just more history
• So many were frozen, but you we kept warm
• The dead eat hope. We had none to give them, so they were pretty emaciated by the end.
• So There We Were
• I Bet You Don't Know When The Song Is Going To End
• don't care
• I don't have a thing to wear!
• We told you when you were hired that you would have to work on Saturday
• Don't
• I don't know
• Don't touch that dial
• Don't Look Back
• I Don't Like Mondays
• Don't Sit Next to Me Just Because I'm Asian
• Americans don't speak English
• We don't need no education
• Don't Tug on Superman's Cape
• Charlie Don't Surf
• Friends don't let friends drive drunk
• Baptist jokes
• Baptist fear of dancing
• Don't give up
• Don't Bet Your Money on de Shanghai
• Don't be sexist. Broads hate that.
• Show, don't tell
• Why don't you drink?
• Don't blame Columbine on computer games
• Don't Think Twice, It's All Right
• Don't beat around the bush
• Why I don't like my fellow Asian youth
• Don't Whiz on the Electric Fence
• I don't see like you
• If you can't spell, you're an idiot. "Original ideas" don't come from idiots.
• Don't Drink the Water
• The thing your aunt gave you which you don't know what it is
• Why don't men shave?
• don't comment on my looks
• (Don't display in "New Writeups")
• Don't judge a book by its cover
• I Don't Like Monkeys
• Don't stop. You can sleep when you're dead.
• Don't call me white
• "Don't die to go to heaven, start in on Doctor Pepper and end up on whiskey!!"
• Don't do that then!
• Don't drink through straws on a date
• Don't settle for no damn coupon which they'll try to pass off to you
• Don't be sexy. I said stop that.
• People who don't capitalize their I's

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